Staff Assistants' Quarters

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Staff Assistants' Quarters


A place to hide from people who want to do 'experiments with you'.



This is Staff Assistants' Quarters, because this is where Staff Assistants usually spawn at when the round begins. It is also known as Crew Quarters A, which is confusing considering there are various places that are just called Crew Quarters. Here, crew members can do human things like:

  • Enter a cryogenics unit to exit the game when "real life" calls.
  • Have a cold Donk pocket or warm beer with the nice (?) people coming from the Arrivals Shuttle nearby.
  • Observe microwave radiation heating up hydric acid molecules to provoke a thermodynamic exchange in organic compounds.
  • Sleep in a bed, maybe with, maybe without a bedsheet over it. Or maybe under it? While wearing it?
  • Substitute their external exoskeletons with cranial and thoracic adornment from the wardrobes and FancyPants Sew-o-Matic.
  • Replace their skin with stickers.
  • Talk over a thin metal wire to other humans and hand-bearing lifeforms, through a "far sound".
  • Stimulate their processing organs with card games from the card vendor.
  • Script a "television" show or record one with one of the mobile cameras.
  • Pet a ferret. Or two ferrets. But not three.

Maintenance information

The room has no vents of its own but air is supplied via the arrivals hallway from the West/Port Emergency Air Hookup.

The APC for this room is located right next to the door on the far right side of the room.

The power is supplied via a cable in the Arrivals Dock.

Stationmap.png Locations on Oshan Laboratory
General Civilian & Recreation Security Command Medical Research Cargo & Mining Engineering Off-Station