Clown

What is it about clowns? They seem to be a happy enough bunch, delighted to suffer a pie-in-the-face or a seltzer-down-the-pants just to make us laugh, but what dark compulsion drives these men to hide behind their painted-on smiles and big rubber noses? What madness turns a man into a clown?

-- (Dave Louapre and Dan Swestmen, A Cotton Candy Autopsy)

The Clown was previously a punishment position made to replace the Janitor. Clowns inherently have a high chance of failure or backlash when doing many things (including walking), and have especially mean failures for doing things like trying to perform surgery, wearing a security helmet, using a stun baton, and other preferred methods of grief. Like the Janitor, it turns out that giving griefers an entertainingly shitty job only encourages them, and it was made a regular job.

YES, CLOWNS ARE EXPECTED TO CAUSE MISCHIEF. THAT DOES NOT MEAN THEY CAN BREAK THE RULES.

Shitty Clowns did nothing except stab themselves in the eyes with bananas and scalpels before tripping on their own banana peel and sailing out the airlock. Decent Clowns annoyed people enough that they got hurled into space. Good Clowns enraged everybody and never managed to get caught. Great Clown antics were so creative and entertaining that nobody had the heart to kill them.

Bad Clown Traitors would spawn their unique clown car, immediately drive it into a wall, fly out the windshield, and get savagely murdered. However, in sufficiently skilled hands, Clown Traitors were the stuff of nightmares. They could kill the entire station starting with nothing but a banana peel, or stuff the entire crew into a clown car and drive it into the crusher. These guys are the reason some long-time players get twitchy when they hear honks and squeaks echoing through a maintenance corridor.

BUT THEN SOMETHING HORRIBLE HAPPENED...

Supplementary Video

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