Jobs
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These are all the jobs you can fuck up choose.
Civilian Jobs | ||||
Mugshot | Job Title | Description | Difficulty | Access
|
Staff Assistant | Fight everyone, ruin everything. | Easy | Maintenance | |
64px | Chef | Shout indecipherable gibberish. Fight the Botanists over tomatos. | Easy | Kitchen |
Chaplain | Fart on your bible. Never be around when you are actually needed. | Easy | Chapel | |
Barman | Get drunk, try to shoot the bar patrons with your revolver. Get subsequently looted. | Easy | Bar | |
Botanist | Grow slurrypods, smoke weed erreyday. Ignore the Chef, chainsaw yourself. | Easy to Medium | Hydroponics Maintenance | |
Janitor | Clean already clean floors, whine about beatings. Stuff everything into your trash cart. | Easy to Hard | Janitor's Closet, Maintenance |
Maintenance Jobs | ||||
Mugshot | Job Title | Description | Difficulty | Access |
Mechanic | Ask nicely to scan the Thermals, then run off. Suffocate while building a pod. | Medium | Electronics, Maintenance, Hack into everything | |
Engineer | Use up all the plasma immediately, die in an explosion. Refuse to fix anything. | Easy to Medium | Engineering, Maintenance | |
Miner | Completely ignore the asteroid field, fuck off into space. Run out of air. | Easy to Medium | Engineering, Mining, Maintenance | |
Quartermaster | Buy bees and booze, except when people ask you to. Ride the mail system. | Medium | Cargo Bay, Maintenance, Supplies |
Research Jobs | ||||
Mugshot | Job Title | Description | Difficulty | Access |
64px | Medical Doctor | Never heal anyone, whine when people take Medkits. Offer limb removal as a miracle cure. | Medium | Medbay, Maintenance |
64px | Geneticist | Ask for volunteers, mutate them into epileptic elvis. Get bombed in about 8 minutes. | Hard | Genetics, Maintenance, Medbay |
Roboticist | Steal all the butts. Cry because nobody wants to be a cyborg. | Medium | Robotics, Medbay, Maintenance | |
Scientist | Ignore the Artifact Lab. Start a Telescience expedition, drain all the power. | Hard | Artifact Lab, Chemistry, Toxins, Research Sector, Pathology, Teleporter Lab |
Personnel Jobs | ||||
Mugshot | Job Title | Description | Difficulty | Access |
Security Officer | Beat the utter shit out of the Janitor. Imprison yourself in the Gen Pop. | Soul Crushing | Maintenance, Security, Brig | |
Detective | Get drunk. Take photos. Turn up dead and naked 20 minutes later. | Easy | Detective's Office, Brig | |
Chief Engineer | Realize you have no clue how to start the engine, die in a fire. | Medium | Engineering, Electronics, Bridge, Mining, EVA, Maintenance | |
Research Director | Complain about not having your bomb, try and pick a fight with Heisenbee. | Medium to Hard | Medbay, Research, Genetics, Artifacts, Toxins, Chemistry, Telescience, Pathology, Teleporter, Bridge | |
Head of Security | Get rehired, remind everyone why you were fired in the first place. | Harder than Hard | Everything + Head of Security's Office, Armory, Solitary | |
64px | Head of Personnel | Steal a Space Suit one minute into the shift. Disappear forever. | Medium to Hard | Make your own ID |
Captain | Get drunk, reprogram the AI into a dog. Throw the authentication disk at the Syndicates. | Nightmarish | Everything |
Antagonist Roles | ||||
Mugshot | Job Title | Description | Difficulty | Access |
Traitor | Buy a glowy sword. Hit yourself with the glowy sword. | Medium to Hard | Depends on job | |
Vampire | Stand in the Chapel. | Medium to Hard | Depends on job | |
Nuclear Operative | Speak over the radio two minutes in. Leave the shuttle without a breath mask. | Hard | Maintenance | |
64px | Wizard | Run around trying to kill everyone, get electrocuted by the AI. Whine, respawn, repeat. | Easy to Hard | Walk through walls |
Changeling | Go to Ice Moon to be "The Thing". Fall off a cliff and get eaten by wendigos. | Hard | Depends on job | |
Spy | Lose your PDA, implant braindead people. Remind everyone why they got rid of Rev. | Hard | Depends on job | |
Gangster | Join the gang with the coolest hats. Get murdered by the biggest gang. Never tag anything. | Hard | Depends on job |
Special Roles | ||||
Mugshot | Job Title | Description | Difficulty | Access |
64px | AI | Get bored. Open doors. Turn the airbridges off. | Psychologically Devastating | Everything |
64px | Cyborg | Scream at the crew to make upgrades, forget to recharge. Ignore the AI. | Hard | Everything |
Monkey | Become the Chef's assistant. Get put on the spike for burger-cake. | Nightmarish | Depends, walk under tables | |
Ghost | Rotate chairs, whine in deadchat, rave about omnighosts. | Spooky | Irrelevant |