Difference between revisions of "Jobs"
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|imgwidth=64 | |imgwidth=64 | ||
|title=[[Janitor]] | |title=[[Janitor]] | ||
|description=Clean already clean floors, whine about beatings. Stuff | |description=Clean already clean floors, whine about beatings. Stuff everything into your trash cart. | ||
|difficulty=Easy to Hard | |difficulty=Easy to Hard | ||
|access=[[Janitor's Closet]], [[Maintenance]]}} | |access=[[Janitor's Closet]], [[Maintenance]]}} | ||
| Line 62: | Line 62: | ||
|imgwidth=64 | |imgwidth=64 | ||
|title=[[Mechanic]] | |title=[[Mechanic]] | ||
|description=Ask nicely to scan the Thermals, then run. Suffocate while building a pod. | |description=Ask nicely to scan the Thermals, then run off. Suffocate while building a pod. | ||
|difficulty=Medium | |difficulty=Medium | ||
|access=[[Electronics]], [[Maintenance]]}}, Hack into everything | |access=[[Electronics]], [[Maintenance]]}}, Hack into everything | ||
| Line 70: | Line 70: | ||
|imgwidth=64 | |imgwidth=64 | ||
|title=[[Engineer]] | |title=[[Engineer]] | ||
|description= | |description=Use up all the plasma immediately, die in an explosion. Refuse to fix anything. | ||
|difficulty=Easy to Medium | |difficulty=Easy to Medium | ||
|access=[[Engineering]], [[Maintenance]]}} | |access=[[Engineering]], [[Maintenance]]}} | ||
| Line 86: | Line 86: | ||
|imgwidth=64 | |imgwidth=64 | ||
|title=[[Quartermaster]] | |title=[[Quartermaster]] | ||
|description=Buy | |description=Buy bees and booze, except when people ask you to. Ride the mail system. | ||
|difficulty=Medium | |difficulty=Medium | ||
|access=[[Cargo Bay]], [[Maintenance]], Supplies}} | |access=[[Cargo Bay]], [[Maintenance]], Supplies}} | ||
| Line 100: | Line 100: | ||
|imgwidth=64 | |imgwidth=64 | ||
|title=[[Medical Doctor]] | |title=[[Medical Doctor]] | ||
|description=Never heal anyone, whine | |description=Never heal anyone, whine when people take Medkits. Offer limb removal as a miracle cure. | ||
|difficulty=Medium | |difficulty=Medium | ||
|access=[[Medbay]], [[Maintenance]]}} | |access=[[Medbay]], [[Maintenance]]}} | ||
| Line 108: | Line 108: | ||
|imgwidth=64 | |imgwidth=64 | ||
|title=[[Geneticist]] | |title=[[Geneticist]] | ||
|description= | |description=Ask for volunteers, mutate them into epileptic elvis. Get bombed in about 8 minutes. | ||
|difficulty=Hard | |difficulty=Hard | ||
|access=[[Genetics]], [[Maintenance]], [[Medbay]]}} | |access=[[Genetics]], [[Maintenance]], [[Medbay]]}} | ||
| Line 124: | Line 124: | ||
|imgwidth=64 | |imgwidth=64 | ||
|title=[[Scientist]] | |title=[[Scientist]] | ||
|description=Ignore the Artifact Lab. Start a Telescience expedition, drain all the power | |description=Ignore the Artifact Lab. Start a Telescience expedition, drain all the power. | ||
|difficulty=Hard | |difficulty=Hard | ||
|access=[[Artifact Lab]], [[Chemistry]], [[Toxins]], [[Research Sector]], [[Pathology]], [[Teleporter Lab]]}} | |access=[[Artifact Lab]], [[Chemistry]], [[Toxins]], [[Research Sector]], [[Pathology]], [[Teleporter Lab]]}} | ||
| Line 137: | Line 137: | ||
|imgwidth=64 | |imgwidth=64 | ||
|title=[[Security Officer]] | |title=[[Security Officer]] | ||
|description=Beat the utter shit out of the [[Janitor]]. Imprison yourself in the Gen Pop. | |description=Beat the utter ''shit'' out of the [[Janitor]]. Imprison yourself in the Gen Pop. | ||
|difficulty=Soul Crushing | |difficulty=Soul Crushing | ||
|access=[[Maintenance]], [[Security]], [[Brig]]}} | |access=[[Maintenance]], [[Security]], [[Brig]]}} | ||
| Line 275: | Line 275: | ||
|imgwidth=64 | |imgwidth=64 | ||
|title=[[Monkey]] | |title=[[Monkey]] | ||
|description=Become the [[Chef]]'s assistant. Get put on the spike for | |description=Become the [[Chef]]'s assistant. Get put on the spike for burger-cake. | ||
|difficulty=Nightmarish | |difficulty=Nightmarish | ||
|access=Depends, walk under tables}} | |access=Depends, walk under tables}} | ||
Revision as of 23:47, 13 July 2013
These are all the jobs you can fuck up choose.
| Civilian Jobs | ||||
| Mugshot | Job Title | Description | Difficulty | Access
|
|
Staff Assistant | Fight everyone, ruin everything. | Easy | Maintenance |
| 64px | Chef | Shout indecipherable gibberish. Fight the Botanists over tomatos. | Easy | Kitchen |
|
Chaplain | Fart on your bible. Never be around when you are actually needed. | Easy | Chapel |
|
Barman | Get drunk, try to shoot the bar patrons with your revolver. Get subsequently looted. | Easy | Bar |
|
Botanist | Grow slurrypods, smoke weed erreyday. Ignore the Chef, chainsaw yourself. | Easy to Medium | Hydroponics Maintenance |
|
Janitor | Clean already clean floors, whine about beatings. Stuff everything into your trash cart. | Easy to Hard | Janitor's Closet, Maintenance |
| Maintenance Jobs | ||||
| Mugshot | Job Title | Description | Difficulty | Access |
|
Mechanic | Ask nicely to scan the Thermals, then run off. Suffocate while building a pod. | Medium | Electronics, Maintenance, Hack into everything |
|
Engineer | Use up all the plasma immediately, die in an explosion. Refuse to fix anything. | Easy to Medium | Engineering, Maintenance |
|
Miner | Completely ignore the asteroid field, fuck off into space. Run out of air. | Easy to Medium | Engineering, Mining, Maintenance |
|
Quartermaster | Buy bees and booze, except when people ask you to. Ride the mail system. | Medium | Cargo Bay, Maintenance, Supplies |
| Research Jobs | ||||
| Mugshot | Job Title | Description | Difficulty | Access |
| 64px | Medical Doctor | Never heal anyone, whine when people take Medkits. Offer limb removal as a miracle cure. | Medium | Medbay, Maintenance |
| 64px | Geneticist | Ask for volunteers, mutate them into epileptic elvis. Get bombed in about 8 minutes. | Hard | Genetics, Maintenance, Medbay |
|
Roboticist | Steal all the butts. Cry because nobody wants to be a cyborg. | Medium | Robotics, Medbay, Maintenance |
|
Scientist | Ignore the Artifact Lab. Start a Telescience expedition, drain all the power. | Hard | Artifact Lab, Chemistry, Toxins, Research Sector, Pathology, Teleporter Lab |
| Personnel Jobs | ||||
| Mugshot | Job Title | Description | Difficulty | Access |
|
Security Officer | Beat the utter shit out of the Janitor. Imprison yourself in the Gen Pop. | Soul Crushing | Maintenance, Security, Brig |
|
Detective | Get drunk. Take photos. Turn up dead and naked 20 minutes later. | Easy | Detective's Office, Brig |
|
Chief Engineer | Realize you have no clue how to start the engine, die in a fire. | Medium | Engineering, Electronics, Bridge, Mining, EVA, Maintenance |
|
Research Director | Complain about not having your bomb, try and pick a fight with Heisenbee. | Medium to Hard | Medbay, Research, Genetics, Artifacts, Toxins, Chemistry, Telescience, Pathology, Teleporter, Bridge |
|
Head of Security | Get rehired, remind everyone why you were fired in the first place. | Harder than Hard | Everything + Head of Security's Office, Armory, Solitary |
| 64px | Head of Personnel | Steal a Space Suit one minute into the shift. Disappear forever. | Medium to Hard | Make your own ID |
|
Captain | Get drunk, reprogram the AI into a dog. Throw the authentication disk at the Syndicates. | Nightmarish | Everything |
| Antagonist Roles | ||||
| Mugshot | Job Title | Description | Difficulty | Access |
|
Traitor | Buy a glowy sword. Hit yourself with the glowy sword. | Medium to Hard | Depends on job |
|
Vampire | Stand in the Chapel. | Medium to Hard | Depends on job |
|
Nuclear Operative | Speak over the radio two minutes in. Leave the shuttle without a breath mask. | Hard | Maintenance |
| 64px | Wizard | Run around trying to kill everyone, get electrocuted by the AI. Whine, respawn, repeat. | Easy to Hard | Walk through walls |
|
Changeling | Go to Ice Moon to be "The Thing". Fall off a cliff and get eaten by wendigos. | Hard | Depends on job |
|
Spy | Lose your PDA, implant braindead people. Remind everyone why they got rid of Rev. | Hard | Depends on job |
|
|
Gangster | Join the gang with the coolest hats. Get murdered by the biggest gang. Never tag anything. | Hard | Depends on job |
| Special Roles | ||||
| Mugshot | Job Title | Description | Difficulty | Access |
| 64px | AI | Get bored. Open doors. Turn the airbridges off. | Psychologically Devastating | Everything |
| 64px | Cyborg | Scream at the crew to make upgrades, forget to recharge. Ignore the AI. | Hard | Everything |
|
Monkey | Become the Chef's assistant. Get put on the spike for burger-cake. | Nightmarish | Depends, walk under tables |
|
Ghost | Rotate chairs, whine in deadchat, rave about omnighosts. | Spooky | Irrelevant |
