Difference between revisions of "Jobs"

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m (made some deletions to keep the jokes from being too long and too many.)
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|imgwidth=64
|imgwidth=64
|title=[[Chef]]
|title=[[Chef]]
|description=Give people food poisoning, Deep fry everyone and everything.Yell at the Botanists for not growing tomatoes, fight them for the seed dispenser.
|description= Deep fry everyone and everything.Yell at the Botanists for not growing tomatoes.
|difficulty=Easy
|difficulty=Easy
|access=[[Kitchen]]}}
|access=[[Kitchen]]}}
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|imgwidth=64
|imgwidth=64
|title=[[Chaplain]]
|title=[[Chaplain]]
|description=Never use your secret room or mass driver, run around hitting people with a bible. Never be around when you are actually needed.
|description= Never be around when you are actually needed. Fart on the Bible.
|difficulty=Easy
|difficulty=Easy
|access=[[Chapel]]}}
|access=[[Chapel]]}}
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|imgwidth=64
|imgwidth=64
|title=[[Barman]]
|title=[[Barman]]
|description=Sit in the bar for ten minutes before abandoning it. Try and shoot the Bar Patrons with your revolver, get robbed.
|description=Sit in the bar for ten minutes before abandoning it. Get drunk and die.
|difficulty=Easy
|difficulty=Easy
|access=[[Bar]]}}
|access=[[Bar]]}}
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|imgwidth=64
|imgwidth=64
|title=[[Botanist]]
|title=[[Botanist]]
|description=Grow slurrypods, smoke a weed erreyday. Chainsaw people. Chainsaw yourself.
|description=Grow slurrypods, smoke a weed erreyday. Ignore the Chef.
|difficulty=Easy to Medium
|difficulty=Easy to Medium
|access=[[Hydroponics|Hydroponics]] [[Maintenance]]}}
|access=[[Hydroponics|Hydroponics]] [[Maintenance]]}}
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|imgwidth=64
|imgwidth=64
|title=[[Electrician]]
|title=[[Electrician]]
|description=Convince security to let you make loads of security equipment, rob security after they refuse. Block off escape with vending machines.  
|description= Rob security and steal the Thermals. Block off escape with vending machines.  
|difficulty=Medium
|difficulty=Medium
|access=[[Electronics]], [[Maintenance]]}}
|access=[[Electronics]], [[Maintenance]]}}
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|imgwidth=64
|imgwidth=64
|title=[[Quartermaster]]
|title=[[Quartermaster]]
|description=Ignore the crew's requests, whine about having no money after you buy weapons, fuck off somewhere and never do your job.
|description=Ignore the crew's requests, whine about having no money.
|difficulty=Medium
|difficulty=Medium
|access=[[Cargo Bay]], [[Maintenance]], Supplies}}
|access=[[Cargo Bay]], [[Maintenance]], Supplies}}
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|imgwidth=64
|imgwidth=64
|title=[[Medical Doctor]]
|title=[[Medical Doctor]]
|description=Never heal anyone voluntarily aside from the Captain and Security, complain about people taking med-kits nobody is using. Stuff dead bodies into the sleeper, Beat people with med-kits.
|description=Never heal anyone voluntarily aside from the Captain and Security, complain about people taking med-kits nobody is using.  
|difficulty=Medium
|difficulty=Medium
|access=[[Medbay]]}}
|access=[[Medbay]]}}
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|imgwidth=64
|imgwidth=64
|title=[[Scientist]]
|title=[[Scientist]]
|description=Ignore the Artifact Lab.<strike>Set [[Chemistry]] on fire. Set [[Toxins]] on fire. Set the [[Teleporter Lab]] on fire. Set yourself on fire.</strike> Never go into the mixing room, sit in chemistry the whole match.
|description=Ignore the Artifact Lab.<strike>Set [[Chemistry]] on fire. Set [[Toxins]] on fire. Set the [[Teleporter Lab]] on fire. Set yourself on fire.</strike>
|difficulty=Hard
|difficulty=Hard
|access=[[Artifact Lab]], [[Chemistry]], [[Toxins]], [[Research Sector]], [[Teleporter Lab]]}}
|access=[[Artifact Lab]], [[Chemistry]], [[Toxins]], [[Research Sector]], [[Teleporter Lab]]}}
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|imgwidth=64
|imgwidth=64
|title=[[Chief Engineer]]
|title=[[Chief Engineer]]
|description=Be a constant annoyance in the hallways using your boots, tell the engineers to setup the engine and hope for the best while you run off to the bridge or EVA.
|description=Try and run into space after never setting up the engine, get killed by angry mob.
|difficulty=Medium
|difficulty=Medium
|access=[[Engineering]], [[Electronics]], [[Bridge]], [[Mining Outpost|Mining]], [[EVA]], [[Maintenance]]}}
|access=[[Engineering]], [[Electronics]], [[Bridge]], [[Mining Outpost|Mining]], [[EVA]], [[Maintenance]]}}
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|imgwidth=64
|imgwidth=64
|title=[[Head of Personnel]]
|title=[[Head of Personnel]]
|description=Be terrible and give yourself an all access ID without asking, avoid doing your job at all costs. Steal a Space Suit and disappear forever.
|description= Steal a Space Suit one minute into the shift. Dissapear forever.
|difficulty=Medium to Hard
|difficulty=Medium to Hard
|access=May as well be everything}}
|access=May as well be everything}}
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|imgwidth=64
|imgwidth=64
|title=[[Captain]]
|title=[[Captain]]
|description=Try to be a super cop, fail miserably. Wake in the Bar drunk just after you were robbed of everything.
|description= Wake in the Bar drunk just after you were robbed of everything. Leave the Nuclear Disk with the Cats.
|difficulty=Nightmarish
|difficulty=Nightmarish
|access=Everything}}
|access=Everything}}
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|imgwidth=64
|imgwidth=64
|title=[[Vampire]]
|title=[[Vampire]]
|description=Go on a quest for light-bulb genocide. Ultimately do nothing.  
|description=Stand in the Chapel, die.
|difficulty=Medium to Hard
|difficulty=Medium to Hard
|access=Depends}}
|access=Depends}}
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|imgwidth=64
|imgwidth=64
|title=[[Nuclear Operative]]
|title=[[Nuclear Operative]]
|description=Speak over the radio two minutes in, leave the shuttle without a breath mask. Release the singularity, fly into it later.
|description=Speak over the radio two minutes in, leave the shuttle without a breath mask, die.
|difficulty=Hard
|difficulty=Hard
|access=[[Maintenance]]}}
|access=[[Maintenance]]}}
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|imgwidth=64
|imgwidth=64
|title=[[Spy]]
|title=[[Spy]]
|description=Lose your PDA, implant [[Clown|braindead]] people. Remind everyone why they got rid of [[Game_Modes#Revolution|Rev]].
|description=Lose your PDA, implant [[Clown|braindead]] people. Remind everyone why they got rid of [[Game_Modes#Revolution|Rev]]. Die
|difficulty=Hard
|difficulty=Hard
|access=Depends}}
|access=Depends}}

Revision as of 19:39, 3 February 2013

These are all the jobs you can fuck up choose.

Civilian Jobs
Mugshot Job Title Description Difficulty Access


Jobass.png Staff Assistant Fight everyone, ruin everything. Easy Maintenance
64px Chef Deep fry everyone and everything.Yell at the Botanists for not growing tomatoes. Easy Kitchen
Jobchap.png Chaplain Never be around when you are actually needed. Fart on the Bible. Easy Chapel
Jobbar.png Barman Sit in the bar for ten minutes before abandoning it. Get drunk and die. Easy Bar
Botanist.png Botanist Grow slurrypods, smoke a weed erreyday. Ignore the Chef. Easy to Medium Hydroponics Maintenance
Jobjan.png Janitor Clean already clean floors, whine about beatings. Stuff people everything into your trash cart. Easy to Hard Janitor's Closet, Maintenance


Maintenance Jobs
Mugshot Job Title Description Difficulty Access
Jobelec.png Electrician Rob security and steal the Thermals. Block off escape with vending machines. Medium Electronics, Maintenance
Jobeng.png Engineer Release the Singularity, flee from angry mob. Never set up Solars. Easy to Medium Engineering, Maintenance
Jobminer.png Miner Completely ignore the asteroid field, fuck off into space. Get killed in thirty seconds because you didn't setup internals. Easy to Medium Engineering, Mining, Maintenance
Jobqmas.png Quartermaster Ignore the crew's requests, whine about having no money. Medium Cargo Bay, Maintenance, Supplies


Research Jobs
Mugshot Job Title Description Difficulty Access
64px Medical Doctor Never heal anyone voluntarily aside from the Captain and Security, complain about people taking med-kits nobody is using. Medium Medbay
64px Geneticist Under no circumstance do you ever clone anyone, spend all round being a monkey. Hard Genetics, Medbay
Jobrob.png Roboticist Steal all the metal, cry because nobody wants to be a robot. Hard Robotics, Medbay, Maintenance
Jobsci.png Scientist Ignore the Artifact Lab.Set Chemistry on fire. Set Toxins on fire. Set the Teleporter Lab on fire. Set yourself on fire. Hard Artifact Lab, Chemistry, Toxins, Research Sector, Teleporter Lab


Personnel Jobs
Mugshot Job Title Description Difficulty Access
Jobsec.png Security Officer Beat the shit out of the Janitor. Hold the Stun Baton wrong. Soul Crushing Maintenance, Security, Brig
Jobdet.png Detective Get drunk and shoot people with your revolver. Easy Detective's Office, Brig
Jobceng.png Chief Engineer Try and run into space after never setting up the engine, get killed by angry mob. Medium Engineering, Electronics, Bridge, Mining, EVA, Maintenance
Jobhor.png Research Director Open the valve, die instantly. Medium to Hard Medbay, Research, Genetics, Artifacts, Toxins, Chemistry, Telescience, Teleporter, Bridge
Hos2012.gif Head of Security Get rehired, remind everyone why you were fired in the first place. Harder than Hard Everything + Head of Security's Office, Armory, Solitary
64px Head of Personnel Steal a Space Suit one minute into the shift. Dissapear forever. Medium to Hard May as well be everything
Capn2x.png Captain Wake in the Bar drunk just after you were robbed of everything. Leave the Nuclear Disk with the Cats. Nightmarish Everything


Antagonist Roles
Mugshot Job Title Description Difficulty Access
Jobtrait.png Traitor Do nothing most of the round because you're paranoid that the AI is watching you, get locked down by the AI. Medium to Hard Depends
Dracula.png Vampire Stand in the Chapel, die. Medium to Hard Depends
Joboper.png Nuclear Operative Speak over the radio two minutes in, leave the shuttle without a breath mask, die. Hard Maintenance
64px Wizard Run around trying to kill everyone, get electrocuted by the AI, die. Easy to Hard Walk through walls
Changeling.png Changeling Get caught five minutes into the match, disable all cameras, get stunned by another changeling in disguise, die. Hard Depends
Jobspy.png Spy Lose your PDA, implant braindead people. Remind everyone why they got rid of Rev. Die Hard Depends


Special Roles
Mugshot Job Title Description Difficulty Access
Fancy2x.gif AI Ignore your laws. Electrify doors. Psychologically Devastating Everything
64px Cyborg Ignore the AI. Scream at the crew to make upgrades, forget to recharge. Hard Everything
Jobmonkey.png Monkey Become the Chef's assistant. Get put on the spike for burgers cake. Nightmarish Depends
Ghost.png Ghost Rotate chairs, whine in deadchat, rave about omnighosts. None Irrelevant