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There are many different vehicles that can be found on Goonstation, for all of your drunk driving needs. For the most part, beginning your alcohol-fueled vehicular homicide joy ride is as easy as click-dragging your character sprite onto the vehicle or right-clicking the thing and picking "enter". Should some hooligan steal your ride, hit the vehicle with disarm (yellow hand) or harm (red hand) intent to shove them out, momentarily stunning them and giving you ample time to reclaim your ride.


Segway.png Respect my Authoritah! StunBatonNew.png

The Security department's (for some reason, Medical's) personal fleet, and the proud vehicle of mall cops across the country. Surprisingly robust for something meant to be joke item. It's the fastest non-antagonist vehicle in the game, barring pods, and if you run into anyone while riding it, it will fling you over the handlebars, stunning both you and the person you ran over for a while. It also has lights and siren so that you can warn people to get out of the way annoy the entire fucking station.

Buff-R-Matic 3000

BuffRMatic.png Slip n Slide BuffRMatic.png

The Janitor's personal vehicle, and overall an upgrade over the standard mop and bucket. It can clean the floors simply by moving on them while the buffer's on, much faster than any mop could, and if you switch out the massive (1700+ units!) reservoir of water and space cleaner with something else, you can do far more than just clean. Expect to be pushed off frequently due to the fact that you're making everyone fall on their ass. And then it will be stolen and spaced or used to make everyone else fall down.


Staplerfahrer Klaus!

Designed for reenacting Forklift Driver Klaus moving crates around the QM department. Cargo Bay, naturally, has one, while Cogmap1's Warehouse and Cogmap2's Disposals has another. Features space for up to three crates, free access through plastic flaps, and an amber emergency light (accessed through the Forklift tab) to warn crew that you're coming through and light your way a little bit. To load the crates, get in the forklift and click drag the crate onto the forklift sprite. To unload them, click on the Forklift tab on the right of your display, and choose "drop crates".

Also surprisingly versatile for antags. Not only can the forklift be disabled and turned into an improvised barricade with a screwdriver and pair of wirecutters (use some wire then a screwdriver to reverse it), but it is also handy for kidnappings and hiding bodies. The AI cannot track you while you're inside the forklift because it completely hides your identity, anyone yelling at you from the outside will have to use the radio or you can't hear them, and if someone is in a crate, their screams for help will actually be seen as them being inside the forklift and not the crate. You're also immune to tasers and lasers while riding the forklift, and if you're in space, you will only suffer the suffocation damage, not the burn damage.

Noticeably, it handles quite differently than all the other vehicles. It will keep moving without you if you don't apply the brake (accessible through the Forklift tab), even if you get pushed off or get out to activate a computer or something. In fact, unlike other vehicles, it's actually impossible to stop this thing without applying the brake or running into a wall/solid object. You can't stop it by letting go of your movement keys; the forklift will continue on in the direction it was going without your input. If you put a suitably large object in its path, it'll stop, but if you remove the object, because it keeps going.

Doesn't run people over, sadly, or recreate that scene from Final Destination 3 where it knocks over shelving. Also, if you run into the crusher it'll eat the forklift but safely eject you so you can run, unlike other vehicles! Note that attempting to flip while inside one will give you a concussion and knock you unconscious.

Clown Car


A fun Traitor vehicle. Enter wearing at least two Clown clothing items and prepare for fun. Run people over to give them brute damage and a stun, letting you hop out and stuff them into your car via drag and drop or manually grabbing them. You can fit up to 30 people in the backseat.

Crashing into a wall (though not any other solid object) will fling the driver through the windshield and occasionally the passengers too. Anybody clicking on the car with an empty hand can open the door to let them out.



Onward, my valiant steed!

The M.U.L.E can do far more than just carry crates; it can also be ridden like a surf board! It even drives itself! Simply climb on board and set your destination with your PDA program! Cut the speed limiter wire for the best, most GTA-esque experience. If you're a traitor, you should also remove the safety and watch in glee as it runs everyone over while you scream "GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY!" over the radio!

Utility Tractor

UtilityTractor.png All aboard the Polar Express! UtilityTractor.png

Essentially a airport baggage cart that's also a freight train. Found in Tech Storage and Customs. Can transport crates, items, humans, ANYTHING, just by dragging and dropping its sprite onto an adjacent cargo cart. Connect new carts to it by dragging and dropping additional carts to the last cart of the tractor train. Drag and drop again to disconnect the carts. Strangely enough, only the actual tractor is solid, so other players can walk through the cargo carts with ease. Even stranger, it shares the same taser and laser immunities as the forklift.

Just be careful when connecting carts from a different utility tractor train. They tend act a bit...strange.


Radical! Skateboard.png

Totally gnarly transportation, available exclusively from either Abandoned crates or a certain trader in the QM Console. In the far future, anyone can skate! Humans, Cyborgs, meatcubes, Ghostdrones, AI shellbots--anyone! Just click-drag yourself onto it, and you'll immediately, impeccably start skateboarding. You'll be quite slow at first, but as you do more SICK TRICKS off tables, racks, and other sorts of things, you'll go faster and faster and faster--much faster. Eventually you'll go so fast that you actually phase through walls through sheer hardcore skating. Just, try not to collide into a wall or someone not skateboarding on the way.

Things you can skateboard on:

  • Tables, plain, reinforced, wood, glass, metal, whatever.
  • Girders.
  • Lockers.
  • Racks.
  • Crates.
  • Doors.
  • Asteroid rock walls.
  • Space Pods, including Syndicate drones.

Things you can't skateboard on:

  • Basically anything that's not solid. You'll just go through them though, rather than colliding and falling off.
  • Walls.
  • Windows.
  • People. (It's fine if they're also on a skateboard, fine though.)

Martian Rover

Get your ass to Mars.

You have to repair it first with various parts scatted about the outpost, but once you do, it's pretty awesome. Specifically designed to resist dust storms, it's also similar to the forklift in that it completely hides your identity while you're inside it.


Hi I'm Daisy

A fun virtual vehicle! Drag and drop your character on it and race for the finish line! Pick up power-ups and ride the yellow arrows for massive speed boosts! It's mainly only used in the VR world, but sometimes they're found on the station through Admin shenanigans. Unlike many other vehicles, you cannot be pushed off a go-kart.

Pods and Putts

Red 3 Standing By

See Space Pod for information.


Minisub.png ♫ We all live in a yellow submarine ♫ Minisub.png

Oshan Laboratory's Space Pod equivalent, with many of the same components. The key difference is that get an extra slot for treads, allowing them to move in all eight directions and travel on both ocean floor and station floor tiles. Instead of standard WASD controls though, they have tank controls, meaning A/Arrow Left and D/Arrow Right actually turn the vehicle leftward and rightward, instead of merely moving it left and right.


TrunkSunken.png *honk* Get out of the road! TrunkSunken.png

A rare specimen, only available from certain vendors and Admin shenanigans. Like subs, they can travel on space, ocean, and station tiles, go in all eight directions, and collide into people for the authentic GTA-experience. Like actual cars, they must move forward or backward to face another direction.

Rideable Cats

It's like riding a Luck Dragon

Rare creatures, only found via admin shenanigans, that are identical in function to segways. Only they're cats.


The single most dangerous item on this entire list, laying waste to all it touches.

Get in.

Supplementary Video

Objects and Items
Equipment by Department:
General Objects - Engineering Objects - Mining Equipment - Security Objects - Medical Objects - Science Objects
Pods - Computers - PDAs - Implants - Vehicles
Plants & Hydro Equipment - Foods & Drinks
Syndicate Items - Guns - Grenades - Bombs