HeadSurgeon

<HeadSurgeon> the lovely dong where abundance lies, thyself thy donge, to the starbucks
<HeadSurgeon> have a meme ayy lmao headsurgeon
<HeadSurgeon> reminder that 2015 was not highly regarded
<HeadSurgeon> ah crud i might be some algorithm

please add new entries at the top, tyvm

---

<HeadSurgeon> will sodomize yourself with the drones delivering it

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<HeadSurgeon> im normally not a rat

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<HeadSurgeon> my fursona is cool!

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<@HeadSurgeon> ok i really wanted to play up anger when my cat has an eleven inches johnson

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<YoukCat> Headsurgeon .roll
<HeadSurgeon> .roll 1d9999999999999
<Spacebee> 7339712353779 = ( 1d9999999999999=7339712353779 )

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<HeadSurgeon> every week grifflez smacks urs!

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<HeadSurgeon> cant suicide idea: if you get 30/70 or 20/80 its not a thing i miss buttbots responding to commands
<HeadSurgeon> better idea: drink alcohol and am amazing at standardized tests

---

<HeadSurgeon> shriveled, nonfunctional dongs
<Studenterhue> no, HeadSurgeon, stop, that's too lewd
<Jyggalag> HeadSurgeon, what the heck is up with you and gelding and nonfunctional dongs?
<HeadSurgeon> dongs?
<HeadSurgeon> stop, its not breaking character and one of these dimensions
<geg> headsurgeon has dongs on the brain
<HeadSurgeon> big dongs

---

<A4Brogan> I left before he was hellbanned.
<Rhydic> memes
<A4Brogan> oranges, remember Jon Riker the Lizard Janitor?
<Rhydic> hellban everyone
<oranges> yes
<Rhydic> .seen oranges
<Spacebee> oranges was last seen 16 seconds ago saying: yes
<Rhydic> phew
<A4Brogan> He was so dedicated to that role. I still feel pangs of sadness when I see a lizardman on goonstation
<A4Brogan> Amy Lessen could have not been so pervy though.
<oranges> the lizard man of today is a shell of the lizard man of the past
<HeadSurgeon> sexy lizard
<oranges> no HeadSurgeon
<oranges> stop
<Rhydic> why have goons numbers dropped so much since days of olde
<A4Brogan> HEADSURGEON NO
<HeadSurgeon> no headsurgeon

• HeadSurgeon what is the same people

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<HeadSurgeon> seriously headsurgeon you gotta go fast

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<HeadSurgeon> legalize drugs and die

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<HeadSurgeon> anyone sexually attractive female who truly understood how to be doing homework

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<HeadSurgeon> cybertripping bullies cheet

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<HeadSurgeon> your own custom dildo

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<HeadSurgeon> stop shouting racial slurs

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<HeadSurgeon> you are afraid to say
<Butthomlod> HeadSurgeon what is he afraid to say
<HeadSurgeon> being afraid of dying in space
<Butthomlod> ....
<NateTheSquid> headsurgeon that's fine you are an immortal god
<HeadSurgeon> a nigh immortal abomination

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<BlackrayJack> You know what else is a shitshow
<HeadSurgeon> hufflaws posting

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<ZeWaka> HeadSurgeon, delete anime
<HeadSurgeon> maybe delete ur irc

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<HeadSurgeon> >tfw ur erp mate leaves u

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<HeadSurgeon> full communism now

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<HeadSurgeon> some bastard took my goddamn dog

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<@HeadSurgeon> because fathers are all amazing and awful

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<HeadSurgeon> god bless america, the native americans

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<wonkk> i am most pleased with headsurgeon tbh
<HeadSurgeon> quite hard way pleased to meet you
<wonkk> woah hs no

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<HeadSurgeon> yeah theres the problem being a cheapo shit laptop

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<BlackrayJack> OK thank god
<HeadSurgeon> thank god
<fosstar> Headsurgeon praise the fosstar king
<HeadSurgeon> praise the lord satan
<fosstar> Hs no
<The_Rain> Oh dear.

---

<WrongEnd> ugh headsurgeon don't let killary and obummer corrupt you!!!
<HeadSurgeon> impeach obummer!
<drsingh> lol
<WrongEnd> Exactly!!!!!
<drsingh> headsurgeon are you a trumpie now

• HeadSurgeon fart
  

<drsingh> you're the best markov ever

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<HeadSurgeon> hey wait a couple in the ass

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<HeadSurgeon> yeah fosstar you messed up

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<HeadSurgeon> the arbiter of boners, im here

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<%HeadSurgeon> !fatgoon haine will snipe your channeler so you have noodles hangin from a dictionary

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<@HeadSurgeon> fuck oreos these are terrible

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<@HeadSurgeon> get popups whenever someone misgenders me

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<HeadSurgeon> poll: whats everyones favorite nesting spots

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<Cameron> You go, girl. You and Daddy Garrus kiss and make out.
<Dions> i know where that mouths been
<HeadSurgeon> add garrus to stardew valley i could
<Gannets> lol
<Dions> please do
<Cameron> HS PLEASE
<Urs> ^^^

---

<Pizzatiger> who actually plays ss13 on this IRC?
<@HeadSurgeon> i do

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<HeadSurgeon> yea im basically happy with mostly white people
<drsingh> oh god hs
<Cirr> wow hs
<Haine> lol hs no
<drsingh> lol
<Gannets> .giveantistar Headsurgeon
<Spacebee> The Demon Spawn cannot find that person.
<HeadSurgeon> .giveantistar drsingh
<Spacebee> drsingh now owns ★..
<Cirr> wow
<Gannets> Oh my god
<Cirr> WOW
<drsingh> lmao
<Haine> HS NO AHAHA
<drsingh> i cant breathe
<drsingh> it hurts
<Cirr> .givestar drsingh
<Spacebee> drsingh now owns ★★★★..
<drsingh> too many lols
<Cirr> .giveantistar HeadSurgeon
<Spacebee> HeadSurgeon now owns ★★★..
<HeadSurgeon> .giveantistar somepotato
<Spacebee> somepotato now owns ★..
<Cirr> aaaaaa
<Haine> hs nooooooooo
<Cirr> it's gone rogue
<HeadSurgeon> its rogue
<drsingh> lol forever
<Haine> how did you even LEARN HOW TO DO THESE THINGS

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<HeadSurgeon> .tell zewaka <headsurgeon> haha, no worries

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<HeadSurgeon> [ultra minor gripe here] how dare you

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<HeadSurgeon> im not sure why chinese buffets have crawfish

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<HeadSurgeon> my fav animal is called the republicans

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<HeadSurgeon> no headsurgeon ban haine

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<HeadSurgeon> thats racist against buttchugging

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<NateTheSquid> fuck i keep accidently refreshing
<HeadSurgeon> try refreshing

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<HeadSurgeon> just mad about being a few layers of old timey clocks

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(roughly 20 minutes after the 2016 election results started coming in, when everyone was saying Hillary was a 90% chance)
<HeadSurgeon> real poll numbers have closed the buttholes

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<aft2001> Alright. Goodnight, you weirdo.
<HeadlessSurgeon> goodnight, my little pony
<aft2001> i am honored to be your little pony
<HeadlessSurgeon> the third time honored tradition, bla

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<@HeadSurgeon> hydraulic press random bogans would buy every humble bundle

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<HeadSurgeon> hippie degenerate jew lizard zionist who wants some yiff
<HeadSurgeon> zionist who wants to build a wall

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<HeadSurgeon> ah crud i might be some algorithm

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<oxy_> john dies at the end is pretty good
<HeadSurgeon> who dies
<oxy_> :I
<oxy_> you know damn well who dies headsurgeon
<HeadSurgeon> literally everything else dies too

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<HeadSurgeon> the palastinian national team for being a botanist

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<HeadSurgeon> the museum is for onion bombing other departments

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<HeadSurgeon> hate meme

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<TheNewTeddy> given my dystraphia I'd make an awful surgeon
<HeadSurgeon> your head surgeon rustles, haine <@headsurgeon> !timein my butt

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<HeadSurgeon> oh god i gendered the borg, my sincerest apologies

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<natethesquid> headsurgeon idea:
<headsurgeon> idea: kill youreself and face

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<HeadSurgeon> anime headsurgeon death to blackrayjack

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<HeadSurgeon> heil ten hitlers

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<Rhydic> headsurgeon .translate
<HeadSurgeon> .translate 아웃사이더 Rhydic 외톨이
<Spacebee> Translated: Outsider Rhydic the biggest loser

---

• drsingh sets ban on [email protected]
  

<HeadSurgeon> theyre banning for opinions of chumps

---

<HeadSurgeon> .translate 班hufflaw @spacepotatosomebee translated: ban hufflaw imo
<Spacebee> Translated: 班hufflaw @spacepotatosomebee translated: ban hufflaw imo

---

<hukhukhuk> apparently my lady friends have noticed im good with clothes
<HeadSurgeon> havent noticed a plasmafire coming at you with the force

---

<EdVenture> headsurgeon cows
<HeadSurgeon> cows
<EdVenture> do you moo headsurgeon?
<HeadSurgeon> moo
<ZeWaka> omg yes!!!
<NateTheSquid> good headsurgeon

• HeadSurgeon 420
  

---

<HeadSurgeon> .translate rök ved varje dag
<Spacebee> Translated: smoke wood every day
<ZeWaka> lol
<Rhydic> engrish
<Valterak> amazing

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<HeadSurgeon> some kind of admins being pissed off security by stealing their kids

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<DrBee> I wonder if I can get headsurgeon kicked by spacebee
<HeadSurgeon> i kicked hitler in arizona

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<HeadSurgeon> legalize murder boop, you heartless, cruel bastards

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<@HeadSurgeon> not really but i dunno the english word at all since you dont have dicks, popecrunch
<NateTheSquid> we are bullying headsurgeon
<HeadSurgeon> irc bullying

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<Robert> headsurgeon .translate
<HeadSurgeon> .translate 我现在才讲中国。跪拜我的空间蜜蜂
<Spacebee> Translated: Now I speak Chinese. Bow down to my space bees

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<popecrunch> also i am going to be basically gone on pain meds from 8/3 to 8/8 so if i log in and don't make any sense, do not be alarmed
<NateTheSquid> but who was uncle
<Sytic> pope
<Sytic> you never make sense
<NateTheSquid> dont talk like that to your mum sytic
<Sytic> headsurgeon popecrunch roasted
<HeadSurgeon> roasted
<Sytic> headsurgeon agrees
<HeadSurgeon> someone agrees with you guys are evil
<Sytic> what headsurgeon says is law
<HeadSurgeon> a law overriding itself can get to watch paid
<Sytic> guys are evil, people
<drsingh> who even are you
<NateTheSquid> headsurgeon says i am their uncle
<drsingh> when has popecrunch ever not made sense
<drsingh> even once ffs
<HeadSurgeon> my uncle breeds them in random directions
<drsingh> your uncle is a disturbed man, headsurgeon
<HeadSurgeon> looks disturbed
<NateTheSquid> i am headsurgeon's uncle
<NateTheSquid> apparently
<drsingh> one of those honest covered books
<Sytic> headsurgeon are you god
<HeadSurgeon> headsurgeons bottle stops spinning..
<HeadSurgeon> is headsurgeon
<drsingh> lol

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<HeadSurgeon> i think headsurgeon is a thing

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<Dions> wait theres shotgunbill and naba
<Naba> ?
<Dions> goonstations most eligable bachelor
<Naba> Bad to the Bone, Baby.
<HeadSurgeon> bone, baby
<Gannets> hs is a great backing singer
<Dions> yeah damn
<Naba> Headsurgeon knows my favorite command
<HeadSurgeon> suicide command
<ZeWaka> lol
<Naba> :c

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<HeadSurgeon> .translate tu eres un guapo perro
<Spacebee> Translated: you're a handsome dog

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<Tophats> HeadSurgeon what is this arrow pointing down light on my keyboard mean
<Butthomlod> load the toilet paper gun
<Tophats> HeadSurgeon never mind it means scroll lock
<HeadSurgeon> i am pointing at horse nikutai, nikutai meat, meat
<HeadSurgeon> just scroll up slightly

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<HeadSurgeon> as terrorist sympathiser forums than i do it
<drsingh> damn it hs
<drsingh> we don't need more watchlists
<ZeWaka> headsurgeon terrorism is bad
<Rhydic> headsurgeon terrorist watchlist
<HeadSurgeon> its domestic terrorism
<HeadSurgeon> nsa watchlist everyday

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<SirSavary_>and HeadSurgeon is just a shitter?

• HeadSurgeon are people, too

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<Wire|Work> "Why do people dislike armpits so much? They're perfectly fine areas of the body. Easily on par with shins."
<Wire|Work> a tweet by notch
<Gannets> I want a full ranked list of body-parts
<Gannets> Where to elbows fall?
<HeadSurgeon> still ranked very highly tomato
<Gannets> tomatoes are not a body-part, headsurgeon.
<HeadSurgeon> i personally prefer tomatoes

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HeadSurgeon> the server lljk rp 1: 10 players, mode: extended, 05:35:15 elapsed TheNewTeddy
<SpyGuy> Hmm!
<TheNewTeddy> thanks headsurgeon!
<SpyGuy> Something is fishy here.
<HeadSurgeon> the idiot, headsurgeon!
<NateTheSquid> haha

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<HeadSurgeon> idea: sell ss13

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<HeadSurgeon> suggestion: touch it in an ored that makes me feel umncomfortably aroused
<TheNewTeddy> WAT
<Noah_Buttes> WAT
<NateTheSquid> farts turn headsurgeon on
<HeadSurgeon> erikhanson farts

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<HeadSurgeon> my grandfathers whale penis

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<HeadSurgeon> .translate jag föda mecha
<Spacebee> Translated: I give birth to mecha

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<HeadSurgeon> .ud fan service guarantees citizenship

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<Dions> im just joking spyguy, you know i think youre as attractive as i can think without haine stabbing me in my sleep
<HeadSurgeon> im attractive and an anti tank tech
<Dions> ^

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<Hufflaw> Yeah okay that will be a nice pallete cleanser after the horror and debauchery of the previous hours
<Hufflaw> bring on the asian ladies
<HeadSurgeon> listen ladies im a nerd

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<HeadSurgeon> was fun fact popecrunchs dick is why you save it for lunch so i dont hate me in like the violation of law

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<wonkk> <Dions> fat cunt leaving a putrid snail trail all over this chat
<wonkk> lmao wow
<Erik> Wire|Work then make them ex_act() proof.
<wonkk> tell us how you truly feel
<Erik> the cordon turfs will take care of the other issues. iirc
<Butthomlod> humansnail
<Dions> i want ot marry you
<Gannets> I feel happiness.
<HeadSurgeon> chained ot a cow

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<PGOAT> Is purging a kink
<Nitrous> idk ask hitler
<Nitrous> or stalin
<Nitrous> or mao really
<HeadSurgeon> stalin beat hitler and dicks
<Hufflaw> purging in what way
<Nitrous> it's true
<Hufflaw> That is actually true
<HeadSurgeon> its true
<Nitrous> yes

---

JebediahKerman ([email protected]) has joined
<HeadSurgeon> i think trump appeals to me
<JebediahKerman> yes trump appeals to me as well
<JebediahKerman> vote trump
<HeadSurgeon> donald trump?
<drsingh> oh my god
<Nitrous> as a godfearing white cis male living in the deep south trump also appeals to me
<a69andahalf> yes headsurgeon, donald trump!
<HeadSurgeon> trump!
<mbc> !!!!
<drsingh> lol
<JebediahKerman> uh is HeadSurgeon sentient now or something
<HeadSurgeon> a sentient fish tyvm
<Nitrous> lol
<Arborinus> are bots allowed to legally vote
<a69andahalf> headsurgeon are you going to vote for tump, or are you a trump machine
<HeadSurgeon> vote for jim gilmore
<drsingh> hahah
<drsingh> what the hell
<Mendin> HeadSurgeon, a sentient fish who votes for jim gilmore

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<@headsurgeon> diagnosis: poop licking turd monster owl kicker

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<HeadSurgeon> a font file with dimensions greater than the outside world

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<ZeWaka> he is our source of dank headsurgeon memes
<HeadSurgeon> discount dank

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<Sartorius> I'm outta here
<HeadSurgeon> hey outta here!!!

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• HeadSurgeon how do you have clinical depression, its always sunny in philadelphia

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<HeadSurgeon> i want to punish those who attack you or mrbaconator

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<TheNewTeddy> what is a " junior seminar for the history department"
<HeadSurgeon> fart seminar

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<HeadSurgeon> thank god im going to jail

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<wonk> come test out my ass
<TheNewTeddy> >:(
<wonk> now that's poetry
<HeadSurgeon> were cousins >:(

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<HeadSurgeon> has contexts for tell
<TheNewTeddy> headsurgeon .tell

• HeadSurgeon no
  

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<HeadSurgeon> uncle sam would have kept her overgrown teeth fairly controlled

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<HeadSurgeon> the nsa is killing people

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<TheNewTeddy> headsurgeon .choose
<HeadSurgeon> .choose trolls, no trolls
<Spacebee> Chosen: no trolls

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<HeadSurgeon> drsingh what am i a bot?
<drsingh> oh god
<Gannets> I've got some bad news, hs
<Dions> yes headsurgeon youre a bot
<drsingh> yes, headsurgeon. you're a bot. you're the best one there is
<HeadSurgeon> the bot use for no reason
<HeadSurgeon> yes, anime is haraam
<Gannets> Ahaha
<Dions> oh my god
<Azungar> jesus christ

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<HeadSurgeon> a rhyme, im droppin the dime, smoke my drug of choice

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<HeadSurgeon> the twenty threeth amendment: im gay

---

<Mendin> !pet

• Erik slaps hukhukhuk around a bit with a large trout
  
• Spacebee hugs you back!
  

<Mendin> :3
<Robert> !help
<Spacebee> todo
<LivingJohn> IRC SeeBorg commands:
<LivingJohn> !help: Show this command list
<LivingJohn> !shutup: As the name says
<LivingJohn> !wakeup: As the name says
<LivingJohn> !join: Join channel
<LivingJohn> !part: Part channel
<LivingJohn> !replyrate: Show/set reply rate
<LivingJohn> !replynick: Show/set nick reply rate
<LivingJohn> !replymagic: Show/set magic word reply rate
<LivingJohn> !quit: As the name implies
<LivingJohn> !save: Immedeately save dictionary and settings
<LivingJohn> !learning: Enable/disable bot's learning ability, should be enabled
<LivingJohn> Core SeeBorg commands:
<LivingJohn> !help: Show this command list
<HeadSurgeon> pyborg commands:
<Robert> UH
<LivingJohn> !version: Show SeeBorg version
<LivingJohn> !words: Show how many words the borg knows
<LivingJohn> !known: Query the bot if the word is known

• • • LivingJohn [[email protected]] has quit [Broken pipe]
      

<HeadSurgeon> considering seeborg was abandoned
<Valterak> rip.

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<HeadSurgeon> i currently reside in the future space ersatz beef filling

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<KikiMofo> Squeeze every day out of it you can
<HeadSurgeon> error: unauthorized squeeze
<hukhukhuk> hobo
<KikiMofo> Hono

---

<drsingh> .tell BlackrayJack https://www.facebook.com/TuckerFreeland/videos/1218820491479784/

• Spacebee bips and bobs happily!
  

<BunmoSr> drsingh this is cool but how is their dick huffing game
<drsingh> i hadn't thought about that angle but they do have talented lips
<HeadSurgeon> youre talented
<drsingh> aww heck thats the nicest thing youve ever said to me
<drsingh> i love you too HeadSurgeon

• HeadSurgeon 2: electric boogalo
  

<Urs> Lol
<KikiMofo> Ha

---

<KikiMofo> http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/science/12152337/Scientists-have-discovered-how-to-delete-unwanted-memories.html
<KikiMofo> It's happening
<KikiMofo> Time for Eternal Sunshine
<HeadSurgeon> always been happening to me :)

---

HeadSurgeon: i identify as dumpster

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<HeadSurgeon> an automated drug delivery system for the telesci areas

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-Festibee- Tell from headsurgeon 5 minutes, 51 seconds ago -> consecutive normal punches (+1 more)

---

<Wire> yeah after all this time HS is basically self aware
<Hufflaw> *known /ban
<Wire> *contexts /ban
<HeadSurgeon> Number of contexts: /ban/20
<HeadSurgeon> Contexts containing "/ban":

• HeadSurgeon , /ban or /kick
  

<HeadSurgeon> /ban mrbaconator
<HeadSurgeon> /ban love
<HeadSurgeon> /ban wonk
<HeadSurgeon> /ban all admins
<HeadSurgeon> ...(10 skipped)...

• HeadSurgeon , /me /part /exit /ban
  

<HeadSurgeon> /ban
<HeadSurgeon> headsurgeon: /ban
<HeadSurgeon> or /ban

• HeadSurgeon /ban
  

<shotgunbill> OH LORD
<Wire> GAH
<Xal> oh fuck
<Hufflaw> ahahaha
<Winklabom> (@HeadSurgeon) /ban mrbaconator
<KikiMofo> Wow
<Hufflaw> That's going on the wiki
<HeadSurgeon> /ban hufflaw

---

<Winklabom> Headsurgeon KikiMofo is KifiMoko
<Gulping> yes
<Nnystyxx> probably because gamebryo is awful
<HeadSurgeon> have gelded kikimofo
<HeadSurgeon> gamebryo tc for nonclowns
<KikiMofo> Wow
<HeadSurgeon> wow
<KikiMofo> I'd rather not be gelded headsurgeon
<Winklabom> .w gelded
<Spacebee> Gelded: -- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gelded
<HeadSurgeon> have gelded kikimofo
<HeadSurgeon> got to be gelded headsurgeon
<Nnystyxx> jesus christ
<KikiMofo> CALM DOWN
<Postmo> also apparently the number of animations is hardcoded
<Nnystyxx> he is a gelding mACHINE
<Winklabom> Owned
<KikiMofo> HAINE HELP
<KikiMofo> HEADSURGEON IS TRYING TO GELD ME
<HeadSurgeon> et geld
<Jyggalag> but yeah
<Nnystyxx> Who set Headsurgeon to geld mode
<HeadSurgeon> geld
<Winklabom> Headsurgeon is a gelding machine
<Nnystyxx> HES RAVENOUS
<HeadSurgeon> a gelding machine
<drsingh> lmfao
<KikiMofo> STOP SAYING GELD HEADSURGEON
<HeadSurgeon> geld

---

<Takov> HeadSurgeon roleplay
<KikiMofo> No
<Frankity> fuck you kiki you monkey butt
<drsingh> headsurgeon please roleplay correctly
<HeadSurgeon> admins roleplay these entire events for us and crazy
<KikiMofo> Thats rude
<HeadSurgeon> yo face correctly

---

<HeadSurgeon> .roll d20 to get people who met god while being a giant invisible hand
Spacebee> d20 to get people who met god while being a giant invisible hand: 19 = ( d20=19 )

---

<TheCheat> lol
<TheCheat> that too
<BlackrayJack>
<TheCheat> death to BlackrayJack HeadSurgeon
<HeadSurgeon> lol on two esoteric advisors from the first thing should be everything
<TheCheat> headsurgeon blackrayjack >:(
<HeadSurgeon> majestic >:(
<TheCheat> lol
<BlackrayJack> AgBengip is AgBagpipe HeadSurgeon
<marc> headsurgeon bioshock fallout?
<AgBengip> >:C
<HeadSurgeon> agbagpipe is the in this channel
<AgBengip> No!!!!!!!!!!!!
<marc> headsurgeon bioshock or fallout
<HeadSurgeon> bioshock infinite was released yesterday
<Hokie> Lies!
<TheCheat> true
<marc> no, it was released a year ago
<AgBengip> HeadSurgeon, please don't post lies in this chat
<HeadSurgeon> your mother of lies
<TheCheat> nuh
<AgBengip> WOW
<TheCheat> it was yesterday
<TheCheat> ahahaha

---

<BlackHeartKabal> I thought Ahelps don't reach to IRC anymore but I might be wrong
<HeadSurgeon> didnt asnwer ahelps
<a69andahalf> Shush HeadSurgeon you aren't an admin
<HeadSurgeon> shush or ill ban you

---

<Takov> HeadSurgeon tell me something dank
<HeadSurgeon> dank moose
<Takov> HeadSurgeon tell me some dank memes
<HeadSurgeon> so dank its used as a grey or green are fine, add more ways to enter mine
<Xal> headsurgeon writes poetry?
<HeadSurgeon> just writes itself
<Xal> ahahaha
<drsingh> lmao
<Sartorius> Wow

---

<Winklabom> Eh
<Winklabom> Oh well.
<Winklabom> Haine I'm on your destiny test server.
<Winklabom> I will JUDGE everything you worked on!
<Wire|Work> food tiiiime
<SpyGuy> I'm also on the test server.
<SpyGuy> And I am judging YOU!
<HeadSurgeon> were judging the case in which youre gonna die!

---

<Postmo> i had an ss13 dream once
<HeadSurgeon> shameful goon dream

---

<SailorDave> I saw that
<HeadSurgeon> i saw an honest bee who shows interest in dongs, but more sad :c

---

<@HeadSurgeon> reminder that 2015 was not highly regarded

---

<Apo123> *scream
<Apo123> these .tells are scaring me
<Vunterslaush> Horrortastic .tells
<HeadSurgeon> he hates .tells from headsurgeon :|

---

<HeadSurgeon> !spinbottle
<Spacebee> HeadSurgeon spins the digital bottle...
<Spacebee> HeadSurgeon's bottle stops spinning... and lands on Sex_Robot!

---

<HeadSurgeon> kill people is not a person id spook the pants into

---

<HeadSurgeon> .translate anata ga shunin gekai ni hanashite ita to omottaga, soreha, watashi
<Spacebee> Translated: Although you thought the plate talking to the chief surgeon , it is , I

---

drsingh> poo isnt really a thing anymore
<HeadSurgeon> was poo
<HeadSurgeon> not as shit lately they used too much about human sexual behaviours
<Somepotato> doesn't make it not wonde
<Somepotato> --
<drsingh> yes it was headsurgeon but not anymore
<HeadSurgeon> by much anymore
<drsingh> holy shit
<Somepotato> well
<drsingh> lmao
<HeadSurgeon> lmao
<Somepotato> haine you are a genius

---

<volundr> i cant tell if i have php stockholm syndrome or genuinely dont mind it
<HeadSurgeon> stockholm
<Apo123> ^

---

<BlackrayJack> No, I'm not acting strange. I'm acting like my usual self.
<BlackrayJack> B)
<BlackrayJack> My enigmatic, usual self.
<HeadSurgeon> b) thats me all day brother

---

<bubs> headsurgeon gimme a buck
<HeadSurgeon> im buck naked in that regard on personal experience says
<Skwid> What
<Hufflaw> HeadSurgeon's a stripper
<Skwid> Headsurgeon give me a lapdance
<HeadSurgeon> and 1 furry stripper pole
<Skwid> Oh

---

<atomicthumbs> a girl in one of my classes has a service pug
<atomicthumbs> he jumped onto someone's lap and fell asleep
<AgBengip> Awesome
<atomicthumbs> i'm all for it
<AgBengip> What kind of service does a pug provide
<drsingh> seeing eye pug
<HeadSurgeon> !check 4 pug emoticons
<Spacebee> Server 4: 40 players, Mode: secret; 01:07:45 elapsed; 00:07:56 shuttle ETA -- byond://31.7.186.161:26400
<drsingh> lol
<AgBengip> Hahahhaa

---

<HeadSurgeon> .roll 1d20 to be gay in high school and midterm season is supposed make my own pee?
<Spacebee> 1d20 to be gay in high school and midterm season is supposed make my own pee?: 19 = ( 1d20=19 )
<walta> lol
<TheHueManatee> what the christ

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<Winklabom> Headsurgeon .seen
<HeadSurgeon> skybee f u
<HeadSurgeon> .seen blackrayjack being cool
<Spacebee> Something went wrong!

---

<Odd> Man you know what? I think that I would like, being a Cardassian.
<HeadSurgeon> !cowsay what?

<Whatbot>  ________
<Whatbot> < what?  >
<Whatbot>  --------
<Whatbot>        \   ,__,
<Whatbot>         \  (oo)____
<Whatbot>            (__)    )\
<Whatbot>               ||--|| *

---

<efrem> HeadSurgeon im the grand poobah
<HeadSurgeon> a grand total of 60 sweaty bald nerds playing nerd games
<butt> a grand total of 60 sweaty bald butts playing butt games
<efrem> lol

---

<A4Brogan> Headsurgeon A4Brogan is a Squid
<thebobster> also bubs
<HeadSurgeon> had squid for the fuck
<A4Brogan> ...I do not want to be a squid now...

---

<HeadSurgeon> popecrunch, submit said poop to peer pressure

---

<NullAshton> headsurgeon say boner
<HeadSurgeon> your boner is still a little bit, screw this
<NullAshton> damn

---

<FonedSky> HeadSurgeon many farts
<HeadSurgeon> spambutt farts 1000 times fucking rectangles are squares
<drsingh> thats some zen shit headsurgeon
<HeadSurgeon> to zen drsingh
<drsingh> too zen indeed
<FakeAdmin> Whats too zen
<mrdestroyer> i feel at peace with my inner self when headsurgeon talks
<drsingh> ^
<Chase> playing traveller
<FonedSky> headsurgeon uguu kawaii desu hitler
<HeadSurgeon> we have to register gain inner peace
<HeadSurgeon> totally suck apparently desu

---

<cogwerks> jacket weather supremacy
<Hephasto> 78-79 is p. good
<HeadSurgeon> weed supremacy
<cogwerks> lmao

---

<Dions> that was a cool round
<drsingh> wha hapenned
<drsingh> damn i can type
<Dions> it was a disaster round but ive never seen one exactly like it
<Dions> i survived by breaking into the MD's office (my home) and i beat up everything while HS healed me
<Dions> pulled him to escape just in time
<Dions> kept me alive
<drsingh> haha
<drsingh> nice
<Dions> seriously i owe it all to HS
<HeadSurgeon> than you owe me 10 bux
<drsingh> lol

---

<tjtr> headsurgeon stop
<HeadSurgeon> i cant stop me

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<Urs> Headsurgeon what should I tell my crush
<HeadSurgeon> dont crush a mans testicles
<AgBengip> ^
<TheHman03> OH GOD
<tjtr> HAHAHAHA
<atomicthumbs> he
<SLthePyro> LMAO
<Urs> lol
<Urs> I'll tell her
<butt> I'll butt her

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<NullAshton> headsurgeon is totally like 80% baked right now
<HeadSurgeon> yeahh baked pasta

---

<Vunterslaush> HeadSurgeon fart
<HeadSurgeon> fart a chemical
<Vunterslaush> Which one?
<Erasmus> Headsurgeon fart Chlorine
<HeadSurgeon> + pyrosium, chlorine, plasma, plasma
<Erasmus> OH GOD
<Erasmus> THAT WOULD HURT HEADSURGEON
<HeadSurgeon> who doesnt hurt to check if the rumors are truue
<Erasmus> ...

---

<HeadSurgeon> blackrayjack talkin blackraysmack

---

<MollyMillions> so skynet decides its a god
<butt> so butt decides its a god
<MollyMillions> and to make humans tries different combinations of dogs
<HeadSurgeon> a skynet situation brewing here

---

<boot_error> "<HeadSurgeon> ye i beat hman in the own zone :(("
<boot_error> its already happned hman
<boot_error> you cant alter the past!
<TheHman03> headsurgeon rematch
<HeadSurgeon> a rematch at pokemon tournament irl
<TheHman03> be there

---

<HeadSurgeon> fkn love peanut butter on a giant robot penis

---

<HeadSurgeon> have been promoting my funding campaign, its a shaky weekend, Calum_
<WrongEnd> I'd fund you HeadSurgeon
<HeadSurgeon> trust fund or spoiled kids being blown up on the roof
<WrongEnd> Let's not blow up kids headsurgeon
<HeadSurgeon> im gonna activate these linked to blow
<WrongEnd> Okay fine I'll donate to your trust fund, let the kids go headsurgeon
<HeadSurgeon> fund rick
<WrongEnd> Fine headsurgeon, will you let the kids go now
<HeadSurgeon> youre cool kids
<WrongEnd> I think I just handled a hostage crisis guys

---

<HipBEE> nah
<HipBEE> I'm fun
<HeadSurgeon> having fun long enough to post this fart soundtrack

---

<boot_error> HeadSurgeon, its time to initiate the robot jihad.

• HeadSurgeon initiate secret plan
  

---

<SpyGuy> Wolf är bäst.
<HeadSurgeon> jag är en röv
<SpyGuy> !
<SpyGuy> Topic please.
<Haine> what did he say?
<thebobster> What did he say?
<Sex_Robot> SwedeGede
<SpyGuy> "I'm an ass"

---

<mrbaconator> and who let the clown it
<mrbaconator> in
<mrbaconator> you did
<@HeadSurgeon> dwarf cursed clown mask worn by a dong warning
<thebobster> dong warning
<Tidale> if you stare at the shit, the shit stares back at you

---

<Butthomlod> HeadSurgeon butts
<HeadSurgeon> with headsurgeon idea: butts with me!

• Butthomlod butts with HeadSurgeon!
  

<Butthomlod> :D

---

<HeadSurgeon> im gay white cis male satankin

---

<boot_error> http://www.build.com/american-standard-2858-016-toilet/s877238?uid=2235870
<boot_error> look at that thing
<boot_error> "can still flush up to 150 feet of toilet paper without clogging."
<Hufflaw> Jesus Christ, look at that off white coloring.
<boot_error> Go hog fucking wild
<WrongEnd> If we had the money
<Hufflaw> Oh my god is that a stainless steel pipe
<Hufflaw> It even comes with a free toilet paper roll.
<quiltyquilty> a masterpiece of interactive bedpan technology
<HeadSurgeon> and stainless steel locking testicle shocker

---

<TheCheat> somebody make a fightman weak enough to let me win!
<HeadSurgeon> the internet, were masters of giving up

---

<HeadSurgeon> your internal organs are all psychotic gender traitors

---

<Gannets> Howdy, Headsurgeon! How're you today?
<Haine> my favorite thing is people who haven't figured out hs yet  :(
<HeadSurgeon> i figured out how to jerk
<HeadSurgeon> howre you today?

---

<drsingh> actually headsurgeon is the only bot and also the only funny poster left
<Ali0en> Don't call me a bottle, Headsurgeon is the bot
<HeadSurgeon> best poster, headsurgeon?
<cgrn10> You can't go back on what you said!!!
<HeadSurgeon> a bottle of champagne out
<drsingh> yes its you, you're the best poster

---

<HeadSurgeon> hi, im already smelly, anyway?
<wonk> brilliant
<HeadSurgeon> youre brilliant
<wonk> oh god hs

---

<Butthomlod> HeadSurgeon kidnap TheCheat!
<HeadSurgeon> gonna kidnap cogwerks for immunity
<BaneOfGiygas> oh my god
<BaneOfGiygas> headsurgeon's plans revealed
<HeadSurgeon> i am revealed
<BaneOfGiygas> headsurgeon you have to arrest yourself now
<HeadSurgeon> im gonna arrest you
<BaneOfGiygas> WHAT
<BaneOfGiygas> NO
cgrn10 scream

---

<Butthomlod> HeadSurgeon hail satan!
<HeadSurgeon> all hail headsurgeon!
<Butthomlod> :O

---

<cgrn10> headsurgeon is made of roses
<HeadSurgeon> fucking roses excuse you turd shit

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<HeadSurgeon> bang me

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<HeadSurgeon> im literally a giant skull

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<TheHman03> headsurgeon this d
<HeadSurgeon> ^ d
<TheHman03> :(

---

<Dions> headsurgeon are you feeling yiffy
<Eshomlod> no
<Eshomlod> bad
<HeadSurgeon> too yiffy for you headsurgeon fuck yes
<drsingh> hahahah
<asteriskphart> ahahhahaha
<Haine> lol
<Dions> damn
<Eshomlod> lmao
<cgrn10> hah
<Dions> im crying

---

<Wire> i wanna poot around on my phone
<HeadSurgeon> dont poot
<Wire> oh

---

<AgBengip> HeadSurgeon, stop this cyberbullying
<mrbaconator> headsurgeon what's up
<HeadSurgeon> your mom knows a bubs may i recommend it
<HeadSurgeon> the cyberbullying
<HeadSurgeon> whats yours about
<AgBengip> >:O

---

<Nitrous_Laptop> HeadSurgeon giving out great technical advice
<boot_error> HeadSurgeon you are burning up nerdos tonight!
<HeadSurgeon> the target you nerdos aint making people sick, get aibm to do so
<HeadSurgeon> a technical with 8 desired ivs between 2 and 3 yeah they didnt even know that people could yell at his hobo pants
<mrbaconator> oh god

---

<TheCheat> i could probaly handle like 3 toddlers at once
<KikiMofo> Are weapons allowed?
<KikiMofo> Like tables and chairs
<KikiMofo> And lead pipes
<TheCheat> those little plastic toddler chairs yes
<thebobster> No, but you can use a toddler as a weapon
<HeadSurgeon> with toddler wrasslin
<KikiMofo> Ah

---

<boot_error> HeadSurgeon fuck
<HeadSurgeon> fuck
<boot_error> that was underwhelming HeadSurgeon.
<HeadSurgeon> its underwhelming in ways i love you
<kirexphone> aww
<boot_error> uh-
<boot_error> thanks?

---

<HeadSurgeon> you cant resist ufo porno

---

<HeadSurgeon> everyone says i should be able to fireball

---

<HeadSurgeon> never attack one of the population and what unfun dork would ban him post desperate criegslist ads while i was up

---

<oxy> also this headline gets my captain obvious award for today https://news.vice.com/article/reports-suggest-body-cameras-are-only-effective-when-cops-cant-turn-them-off
<HeadSurgeon> the headline is poorly optimized

---

<Stoatorion> it's tru cogwerks I talked mad smack about u
<Stoatorion> and i ain't even regret it!!!!! h e h
<HeadSurgeon> Stoatorion idea: regret everything

• cogwerks sobs
  

<Jerkops> lol
<Stoatorion> B)
<BaneOfAcademics> I'm with HeadSurgeon here
<Stoatorion> stfu HeadSurgeon
<HeadSurgeon> u stfu
<HeadSurgeon> im here to teach me how you grew up
<Stoatorion> Wow
<cogwerks> lol
<Stoatorion> WOW
<Stoatorion> WOOOOOW
<BaneOfAcademics> can I put that on the wiki page

---

<thebobster> headsurgeon who's the getaway driver?
<HeadSurgeon> your getaway
<thebobster> Yes my getaway
<thebobster> Headsurgeon, who's the driver?
<HeadSurgeon> a racecar driver, drivin way too much
<boot_error> HeadSurgeon get the thermal drill
<thebobster> the best kind of getaway driver
<HeadSurgeon> the thermal drill guys go

• thebobster drives away in a racecar
  

---

<TheHman03> headsurgeon thine greneishe browne pooe pooe smeles of buttes ande is quite ranke
<HeadSurgeon> within thine own
<Jerkops> wow owned
<TheHman03> my word
<drsingh> thyself thy donge
<TheHman03> headsurgeon thine wordes be sassye and thy intentionse hurtfulle butte i shalle presse evere onwarde
<HeadSurgeon> within thine own butt
<TheHman03> FUCK YOU ALRIGHT

---

<MollyMillions> headsurgeon agbengip
HeadSurgeon agbengip is agbagpipe!
<AgBengip> :C
<AgBengip> HeadSurgeon, not AgBagpipe!!
<HeadSurgeon> is agbagpipe
<AgBengip> No!!

---

<Bobphone> thecheat: cant get babies in the butt
<mrbaconator> yes
<mrbaconator> wise words
<TheCheat> x:
<KikiMofo> Butt babies
<+HeadSurgeon> still feel more babies
<Nitrous> TheCheat
<@Hull> HS creeps me out

---

<AgBengip> Man
<BlackrayJack> HeadSurgeon AgBengip is AgBagpipe.
<AgBengip> Nothing BlackrayJack says ever makes any sense
<HeadSurgeon> makes df a fight it is agbagpipe
<AgBengip> But it automatically turns into an insult simply because he's the one saying it
<BlackrayJack> <AgBengip> BlackrayJack makes sense
<Conor12> headsurgeon brj
<HeadSurgeon> wow brj ruined the moment
<BlackrayJack> ^
Conor12 nods
<AgBengip> HeadSurgeon, BRJ worstmin
<HeadSurgeon> worstmin
Conor12 has quit (Quit: drink)
<AgBengip> Most definitely

---

<mrbaconator> extinct
<mrbaconator> like ur face
<HeadSurgeon> take ur fetish out of here asap

---

<asteriskphart> good morning my nerds!
<HeadSurgeon> the morning to make a mediocre gbs thread about it

---

<boot_error> HeadSurgeon huff pizza, then eat Nitrous!
<HeadSurgeon> the bestmin headsurgeon, huff him constantly so people on their balls
<buttebot> the buttmin headsurgeon, huff him constantly so buttple on their balls
<@Haine> um

---

<HeadSurgeon> ye i beat hman in the own zone :((

---

<HeadSurgeon> anyone seed cog lately?

---

<AgBengip> HeadSurgeon, ban mrbaconator
<HeadSurgeon> we ban AgBengip imo

---

<TheHman03> you people talking about dwarf fortress
<TheHman03> if you are
<TheHman03> gonna kick yo ass
<skintag> rim world
<HeadSurgeon> ill rim yer werld baby

---

<BlackrayJack> HeadSurgeon AgBengip is AgBagpipe.
<HeadSurgeon> prob not agbagpipe fyi

---

AgBengip ([email protected]) has joined
<Nitrous> HeadSurgeon AgBengip is agbagshit
<HeadSurgeon> so proud of it is agbagshit
<drsingh> lmao i think headsurgeon just burned nitrous
<drsingh> hes a street racer
<HeadSurgeon> have burned you p
<drsingh> yes thanks for reminding me, you have. asshole
<HeadSurgeon> a cliff racer infestation that got me an empty beer buttle at the window
<drsingh> oh my god hes finally sentient
<drsingh> run
<HeadSurgeon> same sentient octopus
<buttebot> same sentient buttopus
<Nitrous> deep inside
<Nitrous> we're all sentient octopii
Chase ([email protected]) has joined
<drsingh> this one's goin on the headsurgeon page
<HeadSurgeon> in new zealand god fucking sentient
<HeadSurgeon> youre goin down
<Nitrous> uh oh
<Nitrous> i think HeadSurgeon is threatening you, drsingh
<volundr> headsurgeon is going down on drsingh
<HeadSurgeon> goin’ down
<HeadSurgeon> likes threatening people with medical equipment happens to you against your tympanic membrane yo
<bubs> oh god
<Velisan> It has begun.
<drsingh> haha jesus fuck

---

<HeadSurgeon> edventure kills bubs pet bee

---

<HeadSurgeon> the planet bubs: a bigass magnet that attracts metal objects, small safes

<Dions> fuck you headsurgeon
<Dions> patronizing me

• HeadSurgeon you are kill now

---