User:Aloe/Artifact Research in Depth

heavy heavy WIP

I think I just activated a bomb?

Check the chat box. If it said something about 'overloading' or 'collapsing' or is currently billowing colorful smoke in your face, it's bad. If a station-wide announcement was just made about your current location, it's very bad. In either of these cases, you should probably shove it out the nearest ejector, which can be found in this handy dandy guide:

[oh god oh fuck how does this even work]

Cogmap2Cogmap1DestinyClarionOshanHorizonAtlasMantaKondaru

Ejector
Location
South of Research and to the west. Open the door and shove the artifact onto the pad, and it'll take a one-way trip into space.
Access	You, hopefully

Ejector
Location
Through the research podbay and south. Hit the button on the wall to activate the ejector.
Access	You, hopefully

Ejector
Location
For ejecting bad shit.
Access	You, hopefully

Ejector
Location
For ejecting bad shit.
Access	You, hopefully

Ejector
Location
For ejecting bad shit.
Access	You, hopefully

Ejector
Location
For ejecting bad shit.
Access	You, hopefully

Ejector
Location
For ejecting bad shit.
Access	You, hopefully

Ejector
Location
For ejecting bad shit.
Access	You, hopefully

Ejector
Location
For ejecting bad shit.
Access	You, hopefully

If it didn't do any of the above-mentioned things, it just makes noise. Leave it in genetics or something.

Non-GPTIO Commands

Recently (at the time of writing) added commands which require far less typing than GPTIO. Thank zjdtmkhzt for these.
You don't need the square brackets, they're just to denote a variable.

• act [device]              activates device
• deact [device]          deactivates device
• read [device]           reads from device
• info [device]           gets info from device
• xray [S]                sets radstrength to S
• temp [T]                sets temptarget to T
• elec [V] [W]            sets voltage to V and wattage to W. Sets only voltage if one argument is given.
• pitcher [P]             sets pitcher power to P
• stand [0/1]             sets the impactpad stand to off/on

Obtaining Artifacts

In-lab

The most obvious artifact source. You start with two artifacts in the lab, and you might as well analyze them first.

Elsewhere on the Station

All maps have some other artifacts squirreled away, whether in space, maintenance, or the ocean. Ask other scientists or the AI for help finding them.

Quartermaster's Office

Vurdalak sells completely random artifacts, but they can be rather costly, so don't bug the quartermasters about them unless the budget is doing well; still, if it's reasonably far into the round, they're usually happy to buy out the stock. Gragg sells a singular handheld artifact for a relatively high price.
If you sell enough artifacts using the method shown in the next section, the quartermaster's office will start receiving shipments of random artifacts. You'll get a PDA alert when this happens; head down to the cargo bay to collect them, or radio the QMs to send the shipment to your lab via cargo transporter.

Mining

Miners can find artifacts in rocks, but they have a habit of just leaving them in space. Try radioing them or knocking on their door every now and again to check if they've found anything new.

Debris

The debris field is possibly the best and most reliable source of artifacts. A large number spawn scattered around the Z-level, though it can be perilous to reach them. Now if only there was a way to bring them directly to you...

Selling artifacts

Through a lucrative trading agreement with passing merchants, you can now send out artifacts to get money (and more artifacts!) In fact, these traders are so nice, they even pay you for selling a rapidly collapsing artifact bomb! How nice of them.
Here's how to get paid:

1. Grab a pen. There's usually one in the lab or in a nearby office supply locker.
2. Get an artifact label from the pad of them- it looks like a blue sheet- and stick the label onto the artifact. Click the form with a pen (or a hand, but you'll need a pen to write anything) to write on it. First, mark down the artifact origin, since you should already know it. Rarely, artifacts can hide their true origin- don't worry about this, as you won't see it often.
3. Activate the artifact as you usually would, and pen down the stimulus which activated the artifact along with the effect. There's a 'faults' section, but it's not needed for selling. If you want to keep the artifact, it's now neatly labeled for anyone wondering what it does. If you don't want to keep it...
4. It's time to sell! To do this, simply send it out the quartermaster's sell chute. There are three main ways to do this:
   1. The okay method: just drag the artifact to the quartermaster's office. Not recommended for unstable or dangerous artifacts, as people LOVE touching them.
   2. The better method: take a cargo transporter and send the artifact to the quartermaster's pad. They should get the memo that "labeled artifact on pad go out chute".
      DO NOT WORDLESSLY SEND ACTIVE BOMBS TO THE QUARTERMASTER'S OFFICE, YOU THRIFTY FUCK.
   3. The best method: calibrate the science teleporter, find the coordinates of the QM sell belt, and save them in the teleporter. Anywhere along the belt works, as long as a thing teleported there will be shipped out automatically. When you want to sell an artifact, just drag it to the teleporter pad and send it; the conveyor belts will carry it out to be sold, no humans required. If you're fast, this allows you to sell bombs even after you've activated them, as there's almost no chance someone will interfere with or delay the selling. Just be fast.