HeadSurgeon

<HeadSurgeon> the lovely dong where abundance lies, thyself thy donge, to the starbucks
<HeadSurgeon> have a meme ayy lmao headsurgeon

please add new entries at the top, tyvm

-Festibee- Tell from headsurgeon 5 minutes, 51 seconds ago -> consecutive normal punches (+1 more)

<Wire> yeah after all this time HS is basically self aware
<Hufflaw> *known /ban
<Wire> *contexts /ban
<HeadSurgeon> Number of contexts: /ban/20
<HeadSurgeon> Contexts containing "/ban":

• HeadSurgeon , /ban or /kick
  

<HeadSurgeon> /ban mrbaconator
<HeadSurgeon> /ban love
<HeadSurgeon> /ban wonk
<HeadSurgeon> /ban all admins
<HeadSurgeon> ...(10 skipped)...

• HeadSurgeon , /me /part /exit /ban
  

<HeadSurgeon> /ban
<HeadSurgeon> headsurgeon: /ban
<HeadSurgeon> or /ban

• HeadSurgeon /ban
  

<shotgunbill> OH LORD
<Wire> GAH
<Xal> oh fuck
<Hufflaw> ahahaha
<Winklabom> (@HeadSurgeon) /ban mrbaconator
<KikiMofo> Wow
<Hufflaw> That's going on the wiki
<HeadSurgeon> /ban hufflaw

<Winklabom> Headsurgeon KikiMofo is KifiMoko
<Gulping> yes
<Nnystyxx> probably because gamebryo is awful
<HeadSurgeon> have gelded kikimofo
<HeadSurgeon> gamebryo tc for nonclowns
<KikiMofo> Wow
<HeadSurgeon> wow
<KikiMofo> I'd rather not be gelded headsurgeon
<Winklabom> .w gelded
<Spacebee> Gelded: -- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gelded
<HeadSurgeon> have gelded kikimofo
<HeadSurgeon> got to be gelded headsurgeon
<Nnystyxx> jesus christ
<KikiMofo> CALM DOWN
<Postmo> also apparently the number of animations is hardcoded
<Nnystyxx> he is a gelding mACHINE
<Winklabom> Owned
<KikiMofo> HAINE HELP
<KikiMofo> HEADSURGEON IS TRYING TO GELD ME
<HeadSurgeon> et geld
<Jyggalag> but yeah
<Nnystyxx> Who set Headsurgeon to geld mode
<HeadSurgeon> geld
<Winklabom> Headsurgeon is a gelding machine
<Nnystyxx> HES RAVENOUS
<HeadSurgeon> a gelding machine
<drsingh> lmfao
<KikiMofo> STOP SAYING GELD HEADSURGEON
<HeadSurgeon> geld

<Takov> HeadSurgeon roleplay
<KikiMofo> No
<Frankity> fuck you kiki you monkey butt
<drsingh> headsurgeon please roleplay correctly
<HeadSurgeon> admins roleplay these entire events for us and crazy
<KikiMofo> Thats rude
<HeadSurgeon> yo face correctly

<HeadSurgeon> .roll d20 to get people who met god while being a giant invisible hand
Spacebee> d20 to get people who met god while being a giant invisible hand: 19 = ( d20=19 )

<TheCheat> lol
<TheCheat> that too
<BlackrayJack>
<TheCheat> death to BlackrayJack HeadSurgeon
<HeadSurgeon> lol on two esoteric advisors from the first thing should be everything
<TheCheat> headsurgeon blackrayjack >:(
<HeadSurgeon> majestic >:(
<TheCheat> lol
<BlackrayJack> AgBengip is AgBagpipe HeadSurgeon
<marc> headsurgeon bioshock fallout?
<AgBengip> >:C
<HeadSurgeon> agbagpipe is the in this channel
<AgBengip> No!!!!!!!!!!!!
<marc> headsurgeon bioshock or fallout
<HeadSurgeon> bioshock infinite was released yesterday
<Hokie> Lies!
<TheCheat> true
<marc> no, it was released a year ago
<AgBengip> HeadSurgeon, please don't post lies in this chat
<HeadSurgeon> your mother of lies
<TheCheat> nuh
<AgBengip> WOW
<TheCheat> it was yesterday
<TheCheat> ahahaha

<BlackHeartKabal> I thought Ahelps don't reach to IRC anymore but I might be wrong
<HeadSurgeon> didnt asnwer ahelps
<a69andahalf> Shush HeadSurgeon you aren't an admin
<HeadSurgeon> shush or ill ban you

<Takov> HeadSurgeon tell me something dank
<HeadSurgeon> dank moose
<Takov> HeadSurgeon tell me some dank memes
<HeadSurgeon> so dank its used as a grey or green are fine, add more ways to enter mine
<Xal> headsurgeon writes poetry?
<HeadSurgeon> just writes itself
<Xal> ahahaha
<drsingh> lmao
<Sartorius> Wow

<Winklabom> Eh
<Winklabom> Oh well.
<Winklabom> Haine I'm on your destiny test server.
<Winklabom> I will JUDGE everything you worked on!
<Wire|Work> food tiiiime
<SpyGuy> I'm also on the test server.
<SpyGuy> And I am judging YOU!
<HeadSurgeon> were judging the case in which youre gonna die!

<Postmo> i had an ss13 dream once
<HeadSurgeon> shameful goon dream

<SailorDave> I saw that
<HeadSurgeon> i saw an honest bee who shows interest in dongs, but more sad :c

<@HeadSurgeon> reminder that 2015 was not highly regarded

<Apo123> *scream
<Apo123> these .tells are scaring me
<Vunterslaush> Horrortastic .tells
<HeadSurgeon> he hates .tells from headsurgeon :|

<HeadSurgeon> !spinbottle
<Spacebee> HeadSurgeon spins the digital bottle...
<Spacebee> HeadSurgeon's bottle stops spinning... and lands on Sex_Robot!

<HeadSurgeon> kill people is not a person id spook the pants into

<HeadSurgeon> .translate anata ga shunin gekai ni hanashite ita to omottaga, soreha, watashi
<Spacebee> Translated: Although you thought the plate talking to the chief surgeon , it is , I

drsingh> poo isnt really a thing anymore
<HeadSurgeon> was poo
<HeadSurgeon> not as shit lately they used too much about human sexual behaviours
<Somepotato> doesn't make it not wonde
<Somepotato> --
<drsingh> yes it was headsurgeon but not anymore
<HeadSurgeon> by much anymore
<drsingh> holy shit
<Somepotato> well
<drsingh> lmao
<HeadSurgeon> lmao
<Somepotato> haine you are a genius

<volundr> i cant tell if i have php stockholm syndrome or genuinely dont mind it
<HeadSurgeon> stockholm
<Apo123> ^

<BlackrayJack> No, I'm not acting strange. I'm acting like my usual self.
<BlackrayJack> B)
<BlackrayJack> My enigmatic, usual self.
<HeadSurgeon> b) thats me all day brother

<bubs> headsurgeon gimme a buck
<HeadSurgeon> im buck naked in that regard on personal experience says
<Skwid> What
<Hufflaw> HeadSurgeon's a stripper
<Skwid> Headsurgeon give me a lapdance
<HeadSurgeon> and 1 furry stripper pole
<Skwid> Oh

<atomicthumbs> a girl in one of my classes has a service pug
<atomicthumbs> he jumped onto someone's lap and fell asleep
<AgBengip> Awesome
<atomicthumbs> i'm all for it
<AgBengip> What kind of service does a pug provide
<drsingh> seeing eye pug
<HeadSurgeon> !check 4 pug emoticons
<Spacebee> Server 4: 40 players, Mode: secret; 01:07:45 elapsed; 00:07:56 shuttle ETA -- byond://31.7.186.161:26400
<drsingh> lol
<AgBengip> Hahahhaa

<HeadSurgeon> .roll 1d20 to be gay in high school and midterm season is supposed make my own pee?
<Spacebee> 1d20 to be gay in high school and midterm season is supposed make my own pee?: 19 = ( 1d20=19 )
<walta> lol
<TheHueManatee> what the christ

<Winklabom> Headsurgeon .seen
<HeadSurgeon> skybee f u
<HeadSurgeon> .seen blackrayjack being cool
<Spacebee> Something went wrong!

<Odd> Man you know what? I think that I would like, being a Cardassian.
<HeadSurgeon> !cowsay what?

<Whatbot>  ________
<Whatbot> < what?  >
<Whatbot>  --------
<Whatbot>        \   ,__,
<Whatbot>         \  (oo)____
<Whatbot>            (__)    )\
<Whatbot>               ||--|| *

<efrem> HeadSurgeon im the grand poobah
<HeadSurgeon> a grand total of 60 sweaty bald nerds playing nerd games
<butt> a grand total of 60 sweaty bald butts playing butt games
<efrem> lol

<A4Brogan> Headsurgeon A4Brogan is a Squid
<thebobster> also bubs
<HeadSurgeon> had squid for the fuck
<A4Brogan> ...I do not want to be a squid now...

<HeadSurgeon> popecrunch, submit said poop to peer pressure

<NullAshton> headsurgeon say boner
<HeadSurgeon> your boner is still a little bit, screw this
<NullAshton> damn

<FonedSky> HeadSurgeon many farts
<HeadSurgeon> spambutt farts 1000 times fucking rectangles are squares
<drsingh> thats some zen shit headsurgeon
<HeadSurgeon> to zen drsingh
<drsingh> too zen indeed
<FakeAdmin> Whats too zen
<mrdestroyer> i feel at peace with my inner self when headsurgeon talks
<drsingh> ^
<Chase> playing traveller
<FonedSky> headsurgeon uguu kawaii desu hitler
<HeadSurgeon> we have to register gain inner peace
<HeadSurgeon> totally suck apparently desu

<cogwerks> jacket weather supremacy
<Hephasto> 78-79 is p. good
<HeadSurgeon> weed supremacy
<cogwerks> lmao

<Dions> that was a cool round
<drsingh> wha hapenned
<drsingh> damn i can type
<Dions> it was a disaster round but ive never seen one exactly like it
<Dions> i survived by breaking into the MD's office (my home) and i beat up everything while HS healed me
<Dions> pulled him to escape just in time
<Dions> kept me alive
<drsingh> haha
<drsingh> nice
<Dions> seriously i owe it all to HS
<HeadSurgeon> than you owe me 10 bux
<drsingh> lol

<tjtr> headsurgeon stop
<HeadSurgeon> i cant stop me

<Urs> Headsurgeon what should I tell my crush
<HeadSurgeon> dont crush a mans testicles
<AgBengip> ^
<TheHman03> OH GOD
<tjtr> HAHAHAHA
<atomicthumbs> he
<SLthePyro> LMAO
<Urs> lol
<Urs> I'll tell her
<butt> I'll butt her

<NullAshton> headsurgeon is totally like 80% baked right now
<HeadSurgeon> yeahh baked pasta

<Vunterslaush> HeadSurgeon fart
<HeadSurgeon> fart a chemical
<Vunterslaush> Which one?
<Erasmus> Headsurgeon fart Chlorine
<HeadSurgeon> + pyrosium, chlorine, plasma, plasma
<Erasmus> OH GOD
<Erasmus> THAT WOULD HURT HEADSURGEON
<HeadSurgeon> who doesnt hurt to check if the rumors are truue
<Erasmus> ...

<HeadSurgeon> blackrayjack talkin blackraysmack

<MollyMillions> so skynet decides its a god
<butt> so butt decides its a god
<MollyMillions> and to make humans tries different combinations of dogs
<HeadSurgeon> a skynet situation brewing here

<boot_error> "<HeadSurgeon> ye i beat hman in the own zone :(("
<boot_error> its already happned hman
<boot_error> you cant alter the past!
<TheHman03> headsurgeon rematch
<HeadSurgeon> a rematch at pokemon tournament irl
<TheHman03> be there

<HeadSurgeon> fkn love peanut butter on a giant robot penis

<HeadSurgeon> have been promoting my funding campaign, its a shaky weekend, Calum_
<WrongEnd> I'd fund you HeadSurgeon
<HeadSurgeon> trust fund or spoiled kids being blown up on the roof
<WrongEnd> Let's not blow up kids headsurgeon
<HeadSurgeon> im gonna activate these linked to blow
<WrongEnd> Okay fine I'll donate to your trust fund, let the kids go headsurgeon
<HeadSurgeon> fund rick
<WrongEnd> Fine headsurgeon, will you let the kids go now
<HeadSurgeon> youre cool kids
<WrongEnd> I think I just handled a hostage crisis guys

<HipBEE> nah
<HipBEE> I'm fun
<HeadSurgeon> having fun long enough to post this fart soundtrack

<boot_error> HeadSurgeon, its time to initiate the robot jihad.

• HeadSurgeon initiate secret plan
  

<SpyGuy> Wolf är bäst.
<HeadSurgeon> jag är en röv
<SpyGuy> !
<SpyGuy> Topic please.
<Haine> what did he say?
<thebobster> What did he say?
<Sex_Robot> SwedeGede
<SpyGuy> "I'm an ass"

<mrbaconator> and who let the clown it
<mrbaconator> in
<mrbaconator> you did
<@HeadSurgeon> dwarf cursed clown mask worn by a dong warning
<thebobster> dong warning
<Tidale> if you stare at the shit, the shit stares back at you

<Butthomlod> HeadSurgeon butts
<HeadSurgeon> with headsurgeon idea: butts with me!

• Butthomlod butts with HeadSurgeon!
  

<Butthomlod> :D

<HeadSurgeon> im gay white cis male satankin

<boot_error> http://www.build.com/american-standard-2858-016-toilet/s877238?uid=2235870
<boot_error> look at that thing
<boot_error> "can still flush up to 150 feet of toilet paper without clogging."
<Hufflaw> Jesus Christ, look at that off white coloring.
<boot_error> Go hog fucking wild
<WrongEnd> If we had the money
<Hufflaw> Oh my god is that a stainless steel pipe
<Hufflaw> It even comes with a free toilet paper roll.
<quiltyquilty> a masterpiece of interactive bedpan technology
<HeadSurgeon> and stainless steel locking testicle shocker

<TheCheat> somebody make a fightman weak enough to let me win!
<HeadSurgeon> the internet, were masters of giving up

<HeadSurgeon> your internal organs are all psychotic gender traitors

<Gannets> Howdy, Headsurgeon! How're you today?
<Haine> my favorite thing is people who haven't figured out hs yet  :(
<HeadSurgeon> i figured out how to jerk
<HeadSurgeon> howre you today?

<drsingh> actually headsurgeon is the only bot and also the only funny poster left
<Ali0en> Don't call me a bottle, Headsurgeon is the bot
<HeadSurgeon> best poster, headsurgeon?
<cgrn10> You can't go back on what you said!!!
<HeadSurgeon> a bottle of champagne out
<drsingh> yes its you, you're the best poster

<HeadSurgeon> hi, im already smelly, anyway?
<wonk> brilliant
<HeadSurgeon> youre brilliant
<wonk> oh god hs

<Butthomlod> HeadSurgeon kidnap TheCheat!
<HeadSurgeon> gonna kidnap cogwerks for immunity
<BaneOfGiygas> oh my god
<BaneOfGiygas> headsurgeon's plans revealed
<HeadSurgeon> i am revealed
<BaneOfGiygas> headsurgeon you have to arrest yourself now
<HeadSurgeon> im gonna arrest you
<BaneOfGiygas> WHAT
<BaneOfGiygas> NO
cgrn10 scream

<Butthomlod> HeadSurgeon hail satan!
<HeadSurgeon> all hail headsurgeon!
<Butthomlod> :O

<cgrn10> headsurgeon is made of roses
<HeadSurgeon> fucking roses excuse you turd shit

<HeadSurgeon> bang me

<HeadSurgeon> im literally a giant skull

<TheHman03> headsurgeon this d
<HeadSurgeon> ^ d
<TheHman03> :(

<Dions> headsurgeon are you feeling yiffy
<Eshomlod> no
<Eshomlod> bad
<HeadSurgeon> too yiffy for you headsurgeon fuck yes
<drsingh> hahahah
<asteriskphart> ahahhahaha
<Haine> lol
<Dions> damn
<Eshomlod> lmao
<cgrn10> hah
<Dions> im crying

<Wire> i wanna poot around on my phone
<HeadSurgeon> dont poot
<Wire> oh

<AgBengip> HeadSurgeon, stop this cyberbullying
<mrbaconator> headsurgeon what's up
<HeadSurgeon> your mom knows a bubs may i recommend it
<HeadSurgeon> the cyberbullying
<HeadSurgeon> whats yours about
<AgBengip> >:O

<Nitrous_Laptop> HeadSurgeon giving out great technical advice
<boot_error> HeadSurgeon you are burning up nerdos tonight!
<HeadSurgeon> the target you nerdos aint making people sick, get aibm to do so
<HeadSurgeon> a technical with 8 desired ivs between 2 and 3 yeah they didnt even know that people could yell at his hobo pants
<mrbaconator> oh god

<TheCheat> i could probaly handle like 3 toddlers at once
<KikiMofo> Are weapons allowed?
<KikiMofo> Like tables and chairs
<KikiMofo> And lead pipes
<TheCheat> those little plastic toddler chairs yes
<thebobster> No, but you can use a toddler as a weapon
<HeadSurgeon> with toddler wrasslin
<KikiMofo> Ah

<boot_error> HeadSurgeon fuck
<HeadSurgeon> fuck
<boot_error> that was underwhelming HeadSurgeon.
<HeadSurgeon> its underwhelming in ways i love you
<kirexphone> aww
<boot_error> uh-
<boot_error> thanks?

<HeadSurgeon> you cant resist ufo porno

<HeadSurgeon> everyone says i should be able to fireball

<HeadSurgeon> never attack one of the population and what unfun dork would ban him post desperate criegslist ads while i was up

<oxy> also this headline gets my captain obvious award for today https://news.vice.com/article/reports-suggest-body-cameras-are-only-effective-when-cops-cant-turn-them-off
<HeadSurgeon> the headline is poorly optimized

<Stoatorion> it's tru cogwerks I talked mad smack about u
<Stoatorion> and i ain't even regret it!!!!! h e h
<HeadSurgeon> Stoatorion idea: regret everything

• cogwerks sobs
  

<Jerkops> lol
<Stoatorion> B)
<BaneOfAcademics> I'm with HeadSurgeon here
<Stoatorion> stfu HeadSurgeon
<HeadSurgeon> u stfu
<HeadSurgeon> im here to teach me how you grew up
<Stoatorion> Wow
<cogwerks> lol
<Stoatorion> WOW
<Stoatorion> WOOOOOW
<BaneOfAcademics> can I put that on the wiki page

<thebobster> headsurgeon who's the getaway driver?
<HeadSurgeon> your getaway
<thebobster> Yes my getaway
<thebobster> Headsurgeon, who's the driver?
<HeadSurgeon> a racecar driver, drivin way too much
<boot_error> HeadSurgeon get the thermal drill
<thebobster> the best kind of getaway driver
<HeadSurgeon> the thermal drill guys go

• thebobster drives away in a racecar
  

<TheHman03> headsurgeon thine greneishe browne pooe pooe smeles of buttes ande is quite ranke
<HeadSurgeon> within thine own
<Jerkops> wow owned
<TheHman03> my word
<drsingh> thyself thy donge
<TheHman03> headsurgeon thine wordes be sassye and thy intentionse hurtfulle butte i shalle presse evere onwarde
<HeadSurgeon> within thine own butt
<TheHman03> FUCK YOU ALRIGHT

<MollyMillions> headsurgeon agbengip
HeadSurgeon agbengip is agbagpipe!
<AgBengip> :C
<AgBengip> HeadSurgeon, not AgBagpipe!!
<HeadSurgeon> is agbagpipe
<AgBengip> No!!

<Bobphone> thecheat: cant get babies in the butt
<mrbaconator> yes
<mrbaconator> wise words
<TheCheat> x:
<KikiMofo> Butt babies
<+HeadSurgeon> still feel more babies
<Nitrous> TheCheat
<@Hull> HS creeps me out

<AgBengip> Man
<BlackrayJack> HeadSurgeon AgBengip is AgBagpipe.
<AgBengip> Nothing BlackrayJack says ever makes any sense
<HeadSurgeon> makes df a fight it is agbagpipe
<AgBengip> But it automatically turns into an insult simply because he's the one saying it
<BlackrayJack> <AgBengip> BlackrayJack makes sense
<Conor12> headsurgeon brj
<HeadSurgeon> wow brj ruined the moment
<BlackrayJack> ^
Conor12 nods
<AgBengip> HeadSurgeon, BRJ worstmin
<HeadSurgeon> worstmin
Conor12 has quit (Quit: drink)
<AgBengip> Most definitely

<mrbaconator> extinct
<mrbaconator> like ur face
<HeadSurgeon> take ur fetish out of here asap

<asteriskphart> good morning my nerds!
<HeadSurgeon> the morning to make a mediocre gbs thread about it

<boot_error> HeadSurgeon huff pizza, then eat Nitrous!
<HeadSurgeon> the bestmin headsurgeon, huff him constantly so people on their balls
<buttebot> the buttmin headsurgeon, huff him constantly so buttple on their balls
<@Haine> um

<HeadSurgeon> ye i beat hman in the own zone :((

<HeadSurgeon> anyone seed cog lately?

<AgBengip> HeadSurgeon, ban mrbaconator
<HeadSurgeon> we ban AgBengip imo

<TheHman03> you people talking about dwarf fortress
<TheHman03> if you are
<TheHman03> gonna kick yo ass
<skintag> rim world
<HeadSurgeon> ill rim yer werld baby

<BlackrayJack> HeadSurgeon AgBengip is AgBagpipe.
<HeadSurgeon> prob not agbagpipe fyi

AgBengip ([email protected]) has joined
<Nitrous> HeadSurgeon AgBengip is agbagshit
<HeadSurgeon> so proud of it is agbagshit
<drsingh> lmao i think headsurgeon just burned nitrous
<drsingh> hes a street racer
<HeadSurgeon> have burned you p
<drsingh> yes thanks for reminding me, you have. asshole
<HeadSurgeon> a cliff racer infestation that got me an empty beer buttle at the window
<drsingh> oh my god hes finally sentient
<drsingh> run
<HeadSurgeon> same sentient octopus
<buttebot> same sentient buttopus
<Nitrous> deep inside
<Nitrous> we're all sentient octopii
Chase ([email protected]) has joined
<drsingh> this one's goin on the headsurgeon page
<HeadSurgeon> in new zealand god fucking sentient
<HeadSurgeon> youre goin down
<Nitrous> uh oh
<Nitrous> i think HeadSurgeon is threatening you, drsingh
<volundr> headsurgeon is going down on drsingh
<HeadSurgeon> goin’ down
<HeadSurgeon> likes threatening people with medical equipment happens to you against your tympanic membrane yo
<bubs> oh god
<Velisan> It has begun.
<drsingh> haha jesus fuck

<HeadSurgeon> the planet bubs: a bigass magnet that attracts metal objects, small safes